Slayers Horror Picture Show
by Gail Moonshayde
Summary: It was supposed to be an easy quest with a big payoff, but everything goes wrong when Gourry and Amelia go missing and Lina and Zel find themselves the guests of honor at one of the Master's affairs. Lina must keep her wits and navigate a night of surprises and come out on top. Rated M for lemony freshness. L/G, L/X, X/?,
1. Chapter 1: There's a Light

_Part One: Dammit, I knew I should have aired that spare tire up!_

_Note_: If a story about the Slayers, set to tune of Rocky Horror Picture Show just sounds like an excuse to write trashy pulp nonsense then… well. You're most probably right. On another note, you don't really have to know anything about RHPS to read this, but I would suggest looking it up. Fantastic movie. Even better go to a midnight showing if you've never seen it before. And bring a tube of red lipstick.

You might need it.

_Copyright_: All Slayers characters owned by Hajime Kanzaka and Rui Araizumi.

All song lyrics and blatantly, er, borrowed plot points of RHPS copyright of Richard O'Brien.

Narrator: A woman in shadow takes a slender volume down from the shelf in a massive library. Her golden hair ripples, changing wind patterns eons away.

_** I would like, if I may, to take you on a  
>strange journey.<strong>_

We never see her face, but you catch the glimmer of a smile as she flips the tome open.

_** It seemed a fairly ordinary night when  
>Lina Inverse and her friends left the<br>comforts of their inn to pursue the  
>rumors of a wicked count and his hoard<br>of ill-gotten gain one late autumn eve.  
>It's true there were dark storm clouds,<br>heavy, black and pendulous, toward which  
>they were hiking. It's true, also, that they<br>were running low on supplies. But they, being  
>normal kids, and on a night out, well,<br>they were not going to let a storm  
>spoil the events of their evening.<strong>_

_**On a night out.  
><strong>_  
>She closes the book marking the place.<p>

_** It was a night out they were going to  
>remember for a very long time.<br>**_

I was soaked to the bone. I don't think I could get any wetter if I threw myself in a lake. I held my cloak over my head in a vain attempt to keep the rain out of my eyes and screamed again.

"Gourry! Amelia! Gourry!" Zelgadis echoed my call a little while later. I could hardly see him, even with his lighting spell bobbing above him.

A second!

I had only turned my back a second, and they had vanished. It was a bright sunny day, I had a good lead on some serious bandit treasure, we were, oh, a half-hour hike into the forest and they disappeared. Okay, maybe it was a joke, or they saw some cute baby animal. Both having the attention span of a caffeinated five year old, they could have just simply wandered off. But neither Zel nor I had heard a thing, or found any foot prints, or a bloody knife, a candy wrapper. No clue… nada. After then it started to sprinkle, I thought maybe they'd come back. Hours later I was tromping through a monsoon screaming after that jellyfish and Amelia. I shivered. With fall setting in it was getting so cold at night. Where could they have gone? Why would they have gone? Who would –_could-_ have taken them?

Lightning flashed and the roar of thunder made me yank the cloak over my ears. This was stupid. All of it. The rain, and the idiots who got lost, and this trip, and the rain.

"Did you hear something?" Zel grabbed me from behind, scaring me out of my brooding. I scowled.

"Who can hear anything over this-" I fumed, but then, suddenly, I did. It was a faint at first; a low rumble. I couldn't place what direction it was coming from. Zel apparently could and dashed off, leaving me to fumble after him. My boots were sinking deep into the soggy ground and I was losing pace. "Hey! Wait!" But he was gone into the darkness, the bob of his lighting spell with him. I trudged on, fuming, conjuring my own light to guide me. This was stupid! Did they all just intend to abandon me in the middle of a forest like this? Me, Lina Inverse? To hell with them!

_But_, a faint voice echoed, _do you really think that they would leave you all alone like this_? I snorted and paced on. Like I knew what they would do. Or where they were. Not that I was worried or anything. They were big kids, they could handle themselves. More lightning cracked overhead, toasting a tree in the distance. So long tree number eight. I think.

"Lina-" Breathed a husky voice in my ear.

I screamed. It was a high-pitched, girly scream. I immediately hated myself for it. I turned to find a rain-soaked chimera smirking in the artificial light.

"There's light up ahead. I think it's coming from a tower or large building."

I stopped chanting my Damu Brass in surprise. "About damn time!" That light just saved your bacon, buddy.

~*~*~*~*~

We made a beeline for the light Zelgadis spotted and eventually discovered a road. Well. We'll just call it a road. It had strange deep ruts that were already being washed away. If possible, it was raining even harder, and the lightning was crackling viciously. My legs ached from trying to run in what amounted to little more than thick soup. I could use Raywing…

Lightning flashed.

Or I could not become a lightning rod this evening.

I finally spotted a tower during one particularly violent fit of lightening. Twisted and rising to the heavens, it screamed 'overdramatic evil overlord' and might just be the place we had originally been looking for before this whole mess started.

We reached the wrought iron fence surrounding its perimeter sooner than I expected. The castle was a gothic disaster of ornately carved stonework and sharp metal. In a strange touch, a planetarium sat atop the highest spire. I could forgive the üaber bad-guy taste because several cheerful, inviting, and, above all, warm lights burned through the unshuttered windows. I could hear music drifting from the castle and I wouldn't even admit to myself how desperately I wanted inside and how badly I wanted to leave, all at once.

"What do you want to bet that Gourry and Amelia are already there?" I yelled over the hammering. "Gourry's got sharp eyes. He'd have spotted this a mile before we did."

"I really don't know about this place." Zel called back. "And what makes you so sure that they would have come here?"

"Women's intuition?" I rolled my eyes. "Well, we can at least check! If they're not here, we'll regroup and got back out and look for them!" As unpleasant as the idea sounded. "Or, since getting lost is their fault in the first place, we can just wait here, where it's warm and dry, for them to find us." Even better.

"It's not like Amelia to just wander off." I think he ignored the rather disbelieving look I gave him. "Something is fishy about this." Always the Debbie Downer.

"Looks, let's just check it out! What's the worst that could happen?" I yelled, immediately regretting the words. I paused, but no ominous thunderclap rolled over us. Whoo! Safe.

Zel gave me what I interpreted as a withering look in the dark and we pressed through the front gate. It creaked on ancient, rusted hinges as Zel heaved against it.

As soon as I slipped through the paranoid feelings I'd been fighting off all afternoon slapped me in the face. Zel gritted his teeth at my side. Lightening flashed and I read the sign on the gate- Enter at your Own Risk. Eye roll. Got it. I laughed. "Well, isn't this d-dramatic?" Dammit, was my voice shaking?

Zel wasn't amused. "Lina, I think we should wait the storm out somewhere else. Something about this just doesn't feel right." _Whoa, it's not like Zel to get hung up just because it's a little creepy._

I stomped my foot in the mush. "Somewhere else? Somewhere else where, exactly? Have you seen a cave, or even a decent sized rock? Or would you rather get fried under a tree!" As if to make my point, lightening flashed close by, downing an example. (Number nine!) The wind gusted up, blinding me and literally drowning out my next words. It ripped the gate out of Zel's hands slamming it shut behind us. It was not a good sound. Like a prison gate, or the door to a dark, lonely cell. Then I heard the ominous thunder clap.

I certainly didn't want to take this moment to mention to Zel that I'd had a terrible feeling about this trip ever since we had started into the forest. Again, call it women's intuition. Or that this feeling had intensified significantly in the last few minutes. Besides, with such a creepy local and atmosphere there was sure to be some awesome treasure inside the castle.

What? My logic is flawless.

He hauled on the gate, but it wouldn't budge. He was chanting an attack spell when another blast of wind carried a voice with it. No… it wasn't. Amelia?

"Zel, is that?" He slapped a hand over my mouth! The nerve! I almost bit him. But… No. I like my teeth. Eh heh… 

"The darkness must go down the river of nights dreaming. Flow morphia slow, let the sun and light come streaming into my liiiiife. Into my liiiiiiiife."

It was definitely Amelia's voice. She was singing. Singing about… "The light…" I arched a delicate eyebrow. "Over at the Frankenstein place?" I imagined I could make out the words. She sounded forlorn and the effect of her voice over the rain was giving me chills. There had to be some vital clue I was missing.

"Burning in the fireplace." Zel confirmed. "There's a light-"

"A light. In the darkness of everybody's life." I slapped a hand over my mouth. I hadn't meant to say that- certainly not in tune. I wanted to ask what the hell was going on. It only made me feel a little bit better that Zel looked as confused as I felt. His eyes narrowed.

"We need to get inside."

My thoughts exactly.

I nodded, wondering if I trusted myself to speak. Okay, weird factor just increased by a lot, but now I'm more determined to figure out just what the muddy, er, bloody hell is going on!

~*~*~*~*~

The porch was deep and dark. A large, ornately carved door was the only entrance. All the windows on the bottom floor had been boarded up. I balled up my hair and rang it out, adding to the small, muddy pond that was forming beneath me. "Ugh! Remind me, Zel. Did we swim here? I'll never be dry again…" Lightning flashed.

"Look, Lina." Zel pointed to a row of strange contraptions as they were lit up by the electrical display. I added my own bobbing light to the mix.

"What the hell are those?" They had two wheels, covered in metal and caked with mud.

"That's a combustion motor…" Zel shook his head. I wanted to ask what a combustion motor was, but…

"Weird." I muttered. All of this is weird. "And what's with the music? Somebody must be having a party."

"How should be get in?" Zel was examining a boarded up window, drawing his sword to pry off one of the loose boards. Well. I guess we could do it like that, but…

I pulled the bell cord. My ears were still ringing from the volleys of thunder but the gonging was earth-shattering, followed by a piercing scream. I literally jumped into the air. Holy crap, had this place got to me that badly?

"Are you crazy?"

I winked at Zel in what I thought was a saucy way. "Oh come-on, party-pooper. They're not about to leave two starving travelers stranded out in the rain." He looked murderous. I would not be cowed.

The locks on the door clicked and everything seemed much quieter. I put my hands on my hips and tilted my head into the light. Best to make a good first impression.

The door sloooowly creaked open and a sleepy eyed beauty in bizarre garb, we'll call it 'sexy butler', sagged against the door frame.

"Hello."

My jaw dropped.

"Amelia?"


	2. Chapter 2: Time Warp

NARRATOR  
><em><strong>And so it seemed that fortune had smiled<br>on Lina and Zelgadis and that they had found  
>the object of their frantic search -<br>or had they?  
><strong>_  
>Thunderclap.<p>

-

"Holy crap, Amelia! What the hell? We've been looking all over fo-"

"You're wet."

"Um. Yeah." Yes, well, thank you captain obvious. My turn. "It's raining."

She looked unusually shifty eyed as lightning struck again. She glanced at the strange metal carriages. "I think you had better both come inside." Well . . . yeah? I glanced at Zel. He shrugged. Fat lot of help you are.

The inside was just, word of the night, weird. Dead animals stared down at me from every wall. Giant elk heads, deer, moose, yak, and several I don't even know the names for. The blank glass eyes were absolutely piercing. _Come on, Lina. It's only the cold. And the wet. And the really, really damp uncomfortableness._ Amelia led us to a small room, thankfully, away from the dead things and there was a table laden with-

"Food!" My heart swelled with giddy glee and the castle suddenly seemed all the much warmer and kinder. Amelia poured me a drink and passed another to Zelgadis. It was so warm and soothing to my cold hands and throat. And it tasted just like honey! "Ah! That hit the spot! Come on, Zel! Warms you right up!" My speech was marred when I pushed sopping hair out of my face. But, eh, we'll get to that. Zel looked at his drink like it had insulted his mother then took a tentative sip. His eyes brightened. I slapped him on the back for good measure. Wow, for being this wet and miserable, I was feeling rather… charitable.

This gave me pause.

Amelia held a tray of delectable delights. "Canapé?" She drawled.

"Why yes. Don't mind if I do." I snagged half of the contents of Amelia's tray in one practiced swipe. She smiled a big smile at me, but her smile was a little… off. Almost like a normal Amelia smile, but missed the mark by just a smidge. My deviled egg suddenly didn't taste so good. I whirled to Zel but he had the goblet turned up so he wouldn't miss a drop. Oh shi-

"You've arrived on a very special evening. It's one of the Master's affairs."

Zel cut in before I could, dropping the goblet away, guiltily. "Master's? Amelia, are you alright? Where's Gourry? We need to leave now?" Oh, way to clue in now.

The blank stare she leveled at him could have given the dead moose a run for its money.

Okay. Should we grab her and run… Damn, what about Blondie? _No, Lina. It's just the paranoia talking. We need to wait and see what exactly is going on here. Maybe this evening can still be salvaged._

"Oh, affair, l-lucky us, hahaha…" Dammit! I looked at my handful of deviled eggs and set them down. I just didn't think I could stomach them at the moment. And that was a thought I couldn't really stomach. I'm hungry but I can't eat? _No, no, no. Don't be stupid! That's IMPOSSIBLE._

"You're lucky, I'm lucky, he's lucky-" That voice! No. It couldn't be. . . "We're all lucky." My first impression was of too much lace and skin flying down the stair-rail at an unnecessary rate of speed. There was a thump and next thing I knew I was nose deep in cleavage and face to face with a very familiar skull. I screamed (maybe it was more of an enraged shriek). I couldn't help it. I can't tell you what I screamed. It contained a lot of profanity, all strung together into one long, hyper-profane word. "NAGA!" I hauled back and knocked the ever-loving shit out of her and watched, with great satisfaction I might add, as her head ricocheted between the stair railings and she rolled to a stop across the room in a heap of lace, her maid's mop askew atop her head.

I was shaking with rage (and more than a little fear); this was it. I'm leaving. I'm not dealing with Naga. Especially Naga in a maid's costume. Period. I'll come get Gourry in the morning when the sun is up and the world makes sense.

I turned to let Zel in on my little epiphany but he was standing in the opposite corner of the room, eyes round, one eye brow quirked in an, "oh?", working through his second honey drink, Amelia posed, dead doe-eyed with pitcher in hand. I hung my head. I could feel a headache starting to pound behind my left eye.

"We. Are. Leaving." I pointed to Zel and Amelia. "Now." I put as much menace as I could into each syllable. The clock started to strike behind me. I'm sure cut a quite the terrifying figure. In a good way. Amelia just. . . smiled at me, glassy eyed. I ground my teeth.

"It's astounding. Time is fleeting… Madness, takes its toll." And this was suddenly coming from Amelia! She started towards me with those blank doe eyes and big HAPPY grin. I backed away despite myself, running through a list of spells I could cast that wouldn't harm her. . . too much. I mean, this was obviously mind control. I think. Actually it was getting very hard to think. "But listen closely." Okay, Sleeping! Got to cast sleeping. I cast around wildly in my mind for the incantation, but the words jumbled together and my mouth felt like it was filled with marshmallows (mmm, marshmallows…) I mumbled out the first three words when-

"Not for very much longer," Naga was right behind me! Gah! She grabbed me and spun me around. I choked on my wet hair and found myself staggering right into Zelgadis's arms, his goblet clanging to the floor. I heard him curse. Amelia and, oh my gods, Naga were dancing around the small parlor, SINGING. My knees felt weak and the lights were much too bright. My concentration was totally shattered.

Amelia rushed towards me, hauling me to her side locking my right arm in place, "the blackness would hit me!" She sounded hysterically happy.

Naga had her iron grip on Zel's arm, propelling him across the room. He went, unprotesting, looking like he had just swallowed a frog, "And the void would be calling! Ohoho!"

Zel and I were thrown through double doors onto a dais overlooking a crowded ballroom. I decided that I was in hell.

"LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!"

There was mutual clinging. I'm pretty sure Zel latched on to me the same time I latched on to him. He'd never admit it and I won't either, but, honestly, I don't think my knees were going to support me. And oh, the light, my head…

I saw frenzied dancing, everybody had a party hat and cheap sunglasses and I was scared. I did the first rational thing that came to mind: "_BURST RONDO_!" I threw my hands into the air. Somebody was going to explain what was going on… but… Nothing happened… Zel looked at me, eyes glazed. No explosions! No bright lights! No one even heard me yell over the music. _Okay. No. No freaking out yet. Focus, Lina._ "_MEGA BRANDO_!" _Oh…oh shit… _Nothing. Not a spark or flicker erupted into the air around me. It suddenly felt like someone had punched me in the stomach and I felt queasy. I am so screwed. This has to be a mistake.

Zel was just standing there staring at me mouth agape. What was everyone's problem tonight? "Oi! Why don't you try something instead of just standing there?" I hissed, burying my raising panic behind good, old-fashioned anger. Now was not the time to be freaking out.

He started to chant low and fast. _Finally, get your head out of your a-_ Oh. Oh no he wasn't. Nuh uh.

_ Infinite earth, mother, who nurtures all life, Obey my will and be my power-_

_Nowhere to hide, Lina. _My neck snapped as I scanned the room for cover. Or a window to jump out of. Of all the stupid…

Zel thrust his palm to the floor, "_Dug Haut_!"

I said a silent prayer for the damned as the ceiling came crashing down. But nothing happened. Not even a rumble. I opened my eyes, and the dancers were still swirling. I gravely turned towards Zel and sank my fist into his smug, grinning face. I'll admit. It probably hurt me a hell of a lot more than it hurt him, but it made me feel so much better.

But before I could lecture him. . .

-

Cut to NARRATOR'S Library. She pulls down an ornate chart with illustrated dance instructions, whacking it with a baton.

_** Follow Along.**_

One of the dancers jumped up in my face. "It's just a jump to the left!" I cringed away.

"And then a step to your riiiiiight." Zel edged towards me.

Another dancer appeared: "With your hands on your hips!" More terrified clinging.

"You bring your knees in tiiiiight!" The crowd screamed in ecstasy.

"But it's the pelvic thruuuust, that really drives you insa-a-a-a-ane" (A trio of dances surround me whispering "Ho-ha ho-ha ho-ha ho-ha")

"LET'S DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN!" And over and over and over and over.

I made a break for the door, but only to find myself (oh gods) nose deep in Naga's cleavage once again. If I can't leave then let me die! I punched her in the solar plexus this time. I had to find another door, a window. SOMETHING. While I was searching, Naga starting singing… something about being an invisible voyeur. It fit her perfectly. I was vaguely aware of Zel's arm around my waist since I seemed to be having trouble…oh, walking, standing; you name it. I'd kill him later.

I heard a shrill, joyous laugh over by the band. "M-m-m…" Martina. I couldn't even say it. "Did you know she could tap dance?" Zel shook his head, his lips set in a hard thin line drained of color. His face was all but expressionless but I could see true fear in his eyes. I hoped I didn't look that bad.

"Lina, please tell me we ate some bad mushrooms and we're still in the middle of the forest screaming like lunatics." He stood, pale and was sweating. _Mushrooms, oh, gods, yes. Please let it be mushrooms!  
><em>  
>The singing! The dancing! It reached a fevered, fanatical pitch, the music was off beat and everyone was screaming… then they fell in the floor and for the first time all night there was silence. It was deafening. I had never understood what that phrase meant until this moment.<p>

I was suddenly very away that Zel's arms were wrapped all the way around me…to be fair, if I have to, mine were wrapped around him. It was getting hard to tell whose were whose. This would not do. I summoned a strength born of ultimate freakout and horror and shoved him with all my might. His head rebounded off the floor.

"W-what the hell do you think you're doing? Did now seem like a good time to take advantage of an innocent maiden? Huh? Well let me tell yo-" And oh man, was I going to tell him, but, I, uh, seemed to have drawn a lot of unwanted attention from the formerly motionless crowd. _Good job, Lina!_

Suddenly, they started crawling towards me. I cursed and grabbed a woozy Zel by the collar and dragged him with all my might. "Come on Zel, up and at 'em. We gotta get out of here." I could hear a whirring in the background. I backed away as the dancers started to rise.

"Amelia…" He rasped and licked his lips, eyes rolling back in his head.

"Oh hell, we'll just grab her and run. I haven't seen Gourry, I don't think he's here." _I hope he's not here._ I backed into something cold and metal… and moving and had a nasty moment of realization when I noticed everyone was looking at me expectantly. The whirring got louder and there was a clang. I saw something moving upwards out of the corner of my eye. Zel staggered to his feet and drew his sword. In desperation, I drew mine too. The crowd didn't even slow.

"Zel, fuck it, I'm cold, I'm wet, and these people are lunatics. Without magic what do you expect us to do!" I hissed through my teeth."

He snorted beside me. I continued. "Look, you knock Amelia out, grab her, and run, we'll ransack the place and try to find Gourry. If he's even here!" Which I sincerely hoped he wasn't. We both knew we were toast if we had to try and best Gourry in a sword fight. I heard something behind me and looked down.

There was a six inch spiked amethyst encrusted platform heel. Okay. I followed the seam of the stocking up rather shapely legs, a shimmering snakeskin cloak, further up to pursed, ruby-red lips and…

The sword slipped out of my numb fingers and I clutched at the side of the metal cage as my knees gave out. Words. I couldn't find them, but Zel filled in the gaps quite admirably. I'd never heard some of those words come from his mouth. His eyes were wide, pupils nothing but tiny dots of horror. The figure in the metal cage lift threw open the gate and smiled at me. Then winked.

My brain just gave up and quit. That was the last thing I saw before the world went black.


	3. Chapter 3: Come Up to the Lab

I was enjoying unconsciousness until the screams started. Sure it was a little cold. Not to mention large and impersonal but it was easier to think about than my night so far. The screams got a little louder and I started to make out something familiar. My name.

…ina…

_No, just let me sleep…  
><em>  
>…ina! Lina!<p>

I opened my eyes and floating before me was a beautiful young gamine, with round blue eyes dressed in nothing but the tatters of her once demure underwear. She reached towards me. I didn't know how to explain it, but I knew I had to get away. She radiated waves of something that just repulsed me, I had-

SMACK. Reality, literally, slapped me in the face.

My head lulled back as my eyes swam into focus. Zel was crouched over me, fisting my collar in one hand, his breath coming in quick, ragged gasps. Boy he did not look good; such an unhealthy tint of blue. "Pull yourself together, Lina." He gasped. I tasted blood; the bastard had busted my lip. I was reaching for his throat when I happened to look up and remember why I was in the floor. My breath hitched.

Xelloss opened his slitted, inhuman eyes just long enough to wink down at me. My blood ran cold in my veins. I suddenly found myself in Zel's lap, inexplicably, shivering. I don't think he noticed. I hope.

With a swish of his cloak he marched off towards Amelia who was lounging against a column nearby. He circled her as he watched us and purred. "How do you do? I see you've met my faithful handyman. She's a little brought down, because, hmph, when you knocked, she thought you were the candyman."

He ran his lace gloved fingers across her jawline and for a second I could see a flash of revulsion in her eyes before she leaned into the touch. Zel blanched at my side, his fists balling. He shoved me out of his lap and leapt to his feet, heat on his cheeks. I could hear his teeth grinding together.

Xelloss practically floated across the ballroom floor his voice ringing off the walls and gyrating his hips, "I'm not much of a man by the light of the day, but by night I'm one hell of a lover." He grinned and looked right at me! I clawed my way up the side of the lift so I could stand. My knees were shaking and the room was starting to whirl a little.

Xelloss threw off his decadent, snakeskin cloak. A little piece of me died to see him in a corset, garters, and seamed stockings, and those shoes… The audience went wild. I'd swear Zel whimpered.

"I'm just a sweet transvestite!" There were howls of adoration from the crowd. "From transsexual, Transylvania-a-a." The sax player was really laying it down.

"Let me show you around," he grinned and started back towards us, kicking his legs up in the air and… ugh, singing. "You look like you're both pretty groovy."

Zel raised his sword slightly but looked like he wasn't quite sure what to do with it. He raised it defensively. It didn't even occur to me to look for mine. Well. It did, but I didn't really see how it would help, what with the barely being able to stand and all. I wobbled towards Zel.

"Xelloss, cut the shit." He growled. "I don't know what you're up to, but just give us Amelia and we're leaving. You can have your damn party." Xelloss was ignoring him, waving cordially, greeting guests.

"And Gourry." I said only loud enough for Zel to hear. We were probably going to need him.

Xelloss whirled back to us suddenly. "You got caught in a trap, well, how 'bout that?" He raised his eyebrow at me. A trap? Oh hell no. "Well babies, don't you panic. By the light of the night, it'll seem alright. I'll get you a satanic mechanic."

I didn't know what a mechanic was but fumed as he frolicked away. "I'm never eating mushrooms again." Zel didn't even seem to register my comment.

Xelloss lounged his fruity self on his throne and watched us, his eyes glittering. I did not like to see his eyes open, or trained on us with such thoughtful intensity. "Why dont'cha stay for the night?"

"Night," Martina echoed in a hiss adoring Xelloss' stocking leg.

"Or maybe a bite." His words echoed by Naga this time. My stomach rumbled. Treason, I tell you.

"I could show you my favorite. . . obsession." He locked eyes with Amelia. She pursed her lips and raised her eyebrows seductively. "I've been making a man, with blonde hair and a tan," Gourry! "And he's good for relieving my. . . tension." The crowd tittered.

"What the hell have you done with Gourry?" I hadn't meant to scream it. I stalked across the ballroom floor with a vengeance; anger flooding my body with strength. I started chanting. Xelloss jumped out of his throne, strolling towards me. I activated my spell, and, sigh, unsurprisingly, nothing happened. He slapped my ass as he passed. I turned. Who needs magic? At this point I think I could breathe fire! Zel circled a distance away from him, sword in a defensive position. Xelloss posed in the gateway of the lift.

"So, come up to the Lab.  
>And see what's on the slab.<br>I see you shiver with antici. . ." It was suddenly very hard to breathe (oh, say it! Say it! Please!) "Pation." I gasped.

"But maybe the rain. . . is really to blame.  
>So I'll remove the cause, but not. . ." Zel and I exchanged a glance. "The symptom."<p>

He kicked the cage closed and the lift moved out of sight, whirring. My chest felt tight. I was suddenly aware of a mass exodus. The crowd cleared out through secret doors and soon Zel and I were left with only Amelia, Naga, and Martina. Naga slapped a towel on my head and rubbed my hair vigorously. "Hey! Hey!" I snapped the towel off. With one long gloved finger she looped it under my bandeau and pulled it off. "I don't know what you think you're doing—ACK!" Naga whirled behind me with lightning speed and with one tremendous yank ripped every hidden button off my tunic and sent them skittering across the floor, exposing my soaked chemise. Wet and completely transparent it clung like a second skin and showed off my figure beautifully. I felt fire course through my face and my ears burned. She would not live to see the night through! I snarled and turned, but Naga head-locked me and man-handled me out of my shoulder guards and cape. Another wave of queasy weakness was making it increasingly harder to fight back despite my bloodlust.

"Ohhohohoho! Why don't you make it easy on yourself and give up! None can defeat my prowess." She was squishing my windpipe. I flailed. When, exactly, did Naga gain and undress others prowess? She then moved to daintily pulling each fingertip on my glove, sliding it off and tossing it out of sight all the while humming some bump and grind anthem. What, was this a forced striptease? I moaned an inarticulate longing to smash her face into the marble floors.

"Slowly, slowly. It's too nice a job to rush." Martina chimed in. Grabbing a leg and yanking a boot off. I kicked and screamed. Surely Zel would help, right? I caught a glimpse of him, blushing like a damn school girl as Amelia unbuttoned his pants, his shirt already long gone. Rage. Horror, then back to rage. I bit and pulled hair and kicked, but far sooner than later I was kneeling in the floor, panting; bruised, bleeding, and only in my underwear. Naga tossed the towel over my head and her peals of laughter bounced off the ceiling.

Then Martina started in. I shivered. Blood welled over my lip and one, but only one tear leaked out of my eye. It was a tear of pure, unadulterated rage. I was chanting Dragon Slave under my breath. I stopped. I couldn't even feel the power well in my fingertips but I would still find a way to kill them. Each and every last one of 'em.

I hung my head, but, no. I'm not defeated yet. I'm just bidding my time.

Naga pulled me up and pinned my arms to my side, frog marching me to the lift. I looked around for my short-sword or boot dagger, but they were somewhere, buried under hastily shed clothes.

"Nice panties." Naga smirked as Martina pushed Zel my way. I looked down. My face suddenly felt very hot and my ears burned. Oh. I had forgotten I had worn those. B-but what, why not? I can wear what I want! I wasn't expecting to be captured by a bunch of fetish weirdo's who were going to strip me down and display me! I needed something to hold the socks up, and they matched the garters. Besides, it was on sale and who can pass up a deal like that. . .I. I don't have to justify myself to anyone. So there. Besides, it was laundry day and I was down to my last pair. . . Girls deserve nice things sometimes!

I cast a furtive glance at Zel to make sure he wasn't getting an eyeful. He glanced at me and then away quickly. He, like I, was standing there, only in his skivvies. He watched Amelia as she lounged against the lift, pouring a glass of champagne. She then took a long drag out of the bottle.

Huh.

Naga shoved me inside. Zel was then propelled in after me. "Oww…" I glared at him. He quickly shifted his eyes away from my chest. Oh yeah. I'm definitely going to kill him later. I'll add it to my list of things to do. "Getting a good eyeful?"

Amelia smashed the champagne bottle on the ground then slammed the lift shut.

Stony silence. Then: "No, I'm just amazed that they actually stick out." My vision went red. But no. Focus on killing Naga first; Zel can wait. I calmed myself with more than a little difficulty. Zel was focusing on the wall as the lift started to move.

"Way to help me out back there. Too busy enjoying your little Princess's attention?" Oh ho, that made him mad. His eyes flashed.

"Lina," he said through gritted teeth, "I think, maybe, it's just best if we play along for now."

My mouth hung open, "The hell! No way—"

"Lina, we're outnumber and outclassed. If whatever is happening here is strong enough to control Xelloss, then what chance to we stand in a fight?"

"Control him?" I hissed. Thank gods the rest of the passengers seemed to be ignoring us. "How do you know this just isn't the sort of shit he does in his free time? Huh?"

There was that withering look again.

The lift shuddered to a halt and I looked through the passengers a little warily. The gate was opened and we were thrust forward into a large pink room. It was round, with an observation deck overlooking us. Dancers were looking down on us. There were. . . machines. I was having terrible flashbacks from my early years of traveling with Naga. I'd seen something like this before. There was a tank in the middle of the room and in front of it was Xelloss. He was dressed in a rubber lab coat and gloves, his eye makeup made him look absolutely terrifying. The crowd leered down on us and tittered. I crossed by arms over my chest wishing I'd worn normal underthings and glared daggers at Xelloss.

Amelia handed him the glass of champagne and crossed over the large device with flashing lights. "Naga, Martina, go assist Amelia." They left us alone. "I will entertain." He held out a hand that I certainly wasn't going to touch, "And you are?" He raised an eyebrow.

He wanted a name? Seriously? "Cut the shit, Xelloss, you know who I am." I scowled for good measure. Zel pinched me. My hackles rose. Seriously what's with you!

"Play along…" He hissed in my ear.

_When I get my magic back I'm going to play ping pong with your skull_, is what I really wanted to say. Fine. We'll play it your way.

I put my hands on my hips and puffed out my chest. "I'm Lina Inverse, sorcery genius extraordinaire." He looked down and smiled a big, creepy smile.

"Indeed you are. And your friend?" Zelgadis gruffed out his name to receive his own creepy smile in turn. It suddenly felt very hot in the room. I recrossed my arms. Amelia handed him two lab coats, he then handed one to me. "Here, put these on. They'll make you feel less," smirk, "vulnerable." The guests in the observatory tittered. I ran through a list of the spells I wanted to use in a split second. If only. If. Only. "It's not often we receive visitors here, let alone offer them hospitality."

"Hospitality?" Zel spit. Hey, what about playing along! "This! This is what you call hospitality?" Zel stood eye to eye with Xelloss, glaring, radiating indignation.

"My, how forceful you are. Such a perfect specimen of manhood." Zel's bluish complexion turned a purply-pink as Xelloss's eyes roamed up and down him. Some of the congregation leaned over the rails for a closer look. Heh. Your turn, buddy. He threw his lab coat on.

"Everything is in readiness, Master." Amelia declared from the lit up panel. Xelloss left us with one last ingratiating smile. I shivered.

Xelloss stood up on a dais and gave a speech. I don't know what he was talking about to be honest. It was probably bad. Zel, however was soaking up every word. 'Biochemical research' was a word you just didn't hear used very often. Xelloss started to go off on a tangent. (Paradise will be mine!) The audience oohed and ahhed at all the right moments. I was starting to feel weak kneed again. The room was blurring in and out of focus.

I was broken out of my reverie when Xelloss snapped his rubber gloves. "An accident!"

"An accident!" Naga and Martina murmured to each other.

He finished his speech with flourish then turned to us.

"You see Lina and Zelgadis, you are very fortunate. Tonight is the night that my beautiful creature is destined to be born!"

Everyone started to applaud. Xelloss threw his arms out in exaltation then, in a grand sweep and dramatic flash of lightening, pulled the cover off the tank. There was a mummified body floating in it.

This did not bode well.


	4. Chapter 4: And See What's on the Slab

I stared at the wrapped figure in the tank wondering what could possibly come next in my little night of horrors. I licked my lips, wishing for something to wash the bitter tang of the honeyed drink out of my mouth. Zel muttered something next to me but I didn't catch it in the mummer of oohs and aahs from the observers.

The large glowing globes started to dim leaving the room lit only in the blinking lights of the machine. Xelloss gasped and giggled like a fop in a shoe store. I clutched the lab coat tighter around me at that sound. The way he was acting was making me very uncomfortable.

"Throw open the switches on the sonic oscillator!" He tossed his hair back, gesturing pompously to Amelia. Her fingers flew over the control panel, buttons beeping and tweeting.

"And step up the reactor power input three more points!" Amelia hammered on a large button with her fist three times then dropped down to one knee and started unwinding a wheel. With a shrill keening a multifaceted chandelier lowered from the domed ceiling directly over the tank. Xelloss let off another giddy twitter as it came to rest. His grin was wolfish and overstretched as he excitedly spun the nozzles on the chandelier; eight in all. As the liquid filled the tank it started to turn from red to orange, slowly through the spectrum, ending in a startling, glowing violet. The color pulsed, as bubbles frothed over the sides. The acrid medicinal smell stung my nose.

The bubbles suddenly receded as the liquid drained out of the tank with a nasty sluggish slurp. Everything was silent except for the steady thrum of the metal machine. The smell, I realized, had brought my senses into painfully sharp focus. I could hear Zel's irregular breathing to my side and see the sparkles of Xelloss's extreme eye makeup when they caught in the light. I was hyperaware of the way the moan from the tank coursed through my body and the shiver of cloth when the watching mob shifted.

The figure moaned again and its arms started to rise, quivering over its head until it grasped the sides of the tank with strong fingers. I could see its muscles bulge under the wrappings as it pulled itself to its feet.

Xelloss gave a languorous laugh and reached towards it like a new toy, savoring every nanosecond before ripping the wrappings off around its head.

"Gourry!" It was a heartbreaking scream full of wanton longing and fear. I choked when I realized it came from my own traitorous throat. My face burned as I went from an ashen gray to maraschino-cherry red my ears burning through my wet hair. The sudden rush of blood made me feel loopy and agitated and I bit my tongue so I wouldn't say **another word**.

"Lina?" Was the faint replay, then he yelped as Xelloss dove, his face a mask of lust. Gourry leapt to the chandelier, pulling his legs out of Xelloss's reach. Amelia laugh was shrill and mirthless as she dove for the wheel crank and spun it like mad, lifting Gourry high towards the domed ceiling. The lights flicked on and off. I was faintly aware of the band breaking into another fast paced tune. The throng in party hat attire immediately started dancing, singing amongst themselves as the strangest chase scene I had ever witnessed unfolded.

Gourry, like usual, looked a little lost and confused and he kept looking at me. He dangled from the chandelier contraption looking like a deranged healer had gauzed him up drugged him down until Xelloss kicked Amelia away from the crank. With another good kick the crank released dropping Gourry to the floor. He staggered upright as Naga and Martina descended on him, scissors in hand. With a few snips the gauze started to fall, each of them taking the longest strip and pulling until Gourry was spinning like a top. They de-gauzed his arms and legs until Gourry stood all but naked, clad only in shining golden hot pants. My heart gave a little thump even as my brain ground to a halt. _Why it is that no one here can be properly dressed?_

His frantic blue eyes locked with mine across the room, "Lina, whe-" But before he could finish Xelloss launched himself with another deranged cry. Gourry took one look over his shoulder and ran, his eyes wide with fear. Really, I couldn't blame him. If I had just woken up to find Xelloss in drag chasing after me I'd probably be doing the same thing. I might cry a little too.

"Gourry remembers you at least. Whatever aura is around this place doesn't seem to be affecting him." My head turned so fast my neck popped. Zel never looked at me but watched the chase scene impassively. He looked drained and defeated. "I don't know how much longer we can fight this off." I started at him, the bizarre song and dance momentarily forgotten.

"Fight what off? Look, whatever was in the drink will wear off eventually…" I hoped.

"Not just that, Lina, though I think that's far from over." He shook his head, his eyes boring into the blinking machine. "Do you feel it? Like there's another person lurking right behind you, feeding you lines, dictating your actions?" My blood ran cold; I felt the heat drain from my face and my stomach started to roll again. In the depths of my mind I saw a flash of cold blue eyes and rose pink lips; I shoved it away.

I licked dry lips, words jumbling to form a coherent answer when another frenzied Xelloss shriek broke my concentration.

Gourry was pushing through the dancing mob on the upper tier; many were petting and cooing over him. Xelloss was all but crawling after him, his face a terrifying mask. Gourry reached the end and elegantly leap off, landing near Zel and I. He started towards me, eyes determined when Xelloss descended from the upper tier in a whirl of rubber and kink, landing before him crouched like a wild animal. Gourry balked, like any sane human being would, then took off, leaping inside the tank. I couldn't only wonder why he thought that would be a safe haven.

Xelloss climbed the ladder at the end, leaning himself partially into the tank. "Well, really! That's no way to behave on you first day out." Gourry really didn't know how to react to that statement. I could sense the gears turning in that mass of peanut butter he called a brain. "But…" Xelloss continued eyebrow coyly arched, "as you're such an exceptional beauty I'm prepared to forgive." The upper deck erupted in applause. Xelloss motioned Gourry out of the tank. He very warily complied.

"He's a credit to your genius, Master." Amelia declared. Xelloss smiled. Again I spotted just a hint of revulsion before it faded away. I had to find a way to exploit that.

"A triumph of you will." Naga purred, "Ooooh ho ho ho hooo!" I dug my nails into my arm, my bloodlust suddenly rising to the surface.

Martina sauntered up, wrapping her arm around Naga's waist. "He's okay." She perked.

Xelloss's smile faltered. "Okay?" He snarled grabbing Gourry by the arm and dragging him towards Zel and I. "You!" I bristled. "What do you think of him?" Gourry gave me such a pleading, desperate look I suddenly found the floor very interesting.

A small voice piped up, _I've never understood why a man needs all muscles. More muscles than brains if you ask me._I squashed the strange voice. "I think he's fine." I muttered to the floor quietly without much fervor. I looked up to see the creepy, ingratiating smile Xelloss threw my way. At least he stopped opening his eyes.

"Lina!" Gourry hissed, before he was dragged away again. I coughed, my face feeling hot.

"He carries the Charles Atlas seal of approval, and he didn't even take lessons!" The crowd aaahed and politely applauded. I looked everywhere but Gourry, soaking in more of the tacky décor.

Naga and Martina drug out a heavy stack of objects as the band started another tune. Xelloss started his little ditty, a lecherous lilt to his voice. As the song progressed, Xelloss presented Gourry with weights wrapped in bows and a vaulting horse, listing his, er… assets, stating he would (in just seven days) make him a man. Gourry looked as uncomfortable as I felt. He kept glancing at me and Zel a horrified look on his face. Naga and Martina appeared with a pot of oil and slathered it all over his rippling chest.

"He thinks dynamic tension must be hard work…" Xellos purred, running a finger down Gourry's chest. Down and down until Gourry started to panic a little. Xellos whirled away, just short of a rather personal frisking. "Such strenuous living, I just don't understand, when in just seven days, oh baby, I can make you a maaaan." The smile he washed over the frightened and dumbstruck Gourry made me shiver.

I voiced my concerns to Zelgadis. "Y-you don't think that Xelloss would actually, I mean, he couldn't possibly, you know, with Gourry, and—" Okay, I tried to voice my concerns.

"Xelloss is more of a freak than I ever thought possible." Zel answered me very, very quietly. He looked ill. I felt ill. Gourry might be ill any second. I was seeing a trend.

Everyone's attention was plastered to the pale blonde sweating through Xelloss misplaced attentions but I heard a knocking noise. It got steadily louder. Zel tensed at my side. There was a roar then-

Screams erupted from the balcony as a large metal door flew open with a bang. Chunks of ice blasted across the room and the dancers scattered. There was another roar as one of the two wheeled carriages blasted off through the crowd, down the ramp and into the round room proper. I dug my palms into my temples. What now!

As the shimmering fog from the cold air faded I caught a glimpse of who was sitting on the thrumming machine. This time I didn't have to scream out the name incredulously.

"Zangulus!" Martina squealed, voice dripping sugar and hearts. "Zangypoo!"

And, indeed, Zangulus sat astride the two-wheeled monster, wearing his stupid had, holding a v-shaped guitar by the neck. He scowled, brandishing his weapon at Xelloss and an astonished Gourry. I saw glimmers of tears in his frost smattered eyes… or maybe they were just defrosting.

"Foul demon! You thought you could just abduct my love and lock me away?" Xelloss looked miffed. "Have a taste of HOWLING GUITAAAAR!" He thrust forth his chrome plated ax and with a soul eating wail it launched a wave of destruction heading straight for Xelloss. The wave hit a barrier erected before Xellos and dissipated off to the sides, tossing everyone every which way. Martina continued to shriek, little stars in her eyes, which made me wonder if she had ever been under any sort of control to begin with. The band started back up. I groaned and pulled at my hair. Nooooooo!

Martina rushed towards him and he pulled her onto the back of the contraption. Singing about days long past and taking her pants off. Things I really didn't care about or ever, ever want to hear. So far he hadn't seemed to notice Gourry, so no duels of testosterone choking manliness. Soon the audience was caught into the swing and far be it for them to pass up an opportunity to sing along…

"Hot patootie! Bless my soul! I really love that rock-n-roll!"

They continued to sing this over and over until I felt like breaking something. Xelloss watched dispassionately, almost bored until Zangulus dropped Martina off the bike and started racing around the room firing "Howling Guitar" strikes indiscriminately. With a lazy flick of his lace sheathed wrist Xelloss evaporated Zangypoo and his annoying machine. The music stopped abruptly and the guests stared in horror. Martina started screaming. She screamed and screamed, digging fingernails into her face.

Xelloss laughed, clapping. "Ah, one from the vaults." No one laughed along. Naga lazily started picking up ice chunks and tossing them back in the freezer. Amelia karate chopped Martina's neck, cutting off the screams. Her eyes went blank, a dopey smile spreading over her face. She drooled a little but was otherwise quiet.

Xelloss turned back towards Gourry. "And so perish all who reject my love!" _Wow, that's not creepy at all.  
><em>  
>Gourry paled. "Oh no, my little Adonis," Xellos purred, "you're much too beautiful to be destroyed."<p>

"Um….um…" Gourry backed away as far as he could manage before Naga appeared at his back.

She pushed him towards Xellos. "Come on, you're a big boy now. Man up." He gibbered. Fight back, you jello-brained pile of muscle! Why wasn't he fighting back? He could take down Naga without a problem. Or was this one of his gentlemanly hang-ups where he wouldn't strike a lady. Well, Naga was no lady.

"Throw the switch!" Xelloss commanded after he'd finished cooing over the cowering blonde. With a very un-Amelia like grin Amelia popped something on the machine. The whole back wall started to swing out revealing a large suite done in black and royal purple silk. Dripping wax candles added an eerie light to the scene and placed in front of a rather luxurious bed was a large glowing star globe. A wedding march began to play. The guests went wild, throwing confetti and screaming best wishes. Xelloss had a death link on Gourry arm. Even his jellyfish mind grasped what was happening rather quickly and he clawed to get away.

"Lina! Lina! Lina save me! Please!" He begged as Xelloss marched him towards the cocoon of silk and nightmares. Now who's the damsel in distress in this situation?

It took some coaxing to get my shaking knees to move but I careened towards the mismatched couple only to have Naga move squarely in my path, her grin promising terrible things. So be it! I hauled my fist back but even as I threw my punch I knew it lacked speed and finesse. Naga caught my fist, twisting my arm up behind my back. I squirmed in her grasp, but she just upped the pressure. I gasped. Zelgadis was having an easier time with Martina. Every time she landed a blow she would squeal like a five year old and curse. This dance continued until he had her cornered. She yanked her top hat off and bit it, eyeing him like a cockroach and muttering horrible things. I saw Amelia appear out of shadowy passageway armed with an iron skillet. I cried out a warning, but it was too late. Zel's reactions were sluggish; good enough to corner Martina, but Amelia…

There was a sickening clang and Zel collapsed in a heap. I winced. Martina stood up straight and laughed long and hard. "Ah ha! He thought he could best me! What a simpleton!" More laughing.

My arm prickled pins and needles as the blood flow as cut off to it. I struggled in Naga's grasp but her grip tightened. I gritted my teeth against the pain. I spotted Amelia advancing towards me then felt a sharp blow to the neck and then, nothing.


	5. Chapter 5: And They Were Shown

[Author's Note: Fair warning this part is adult and non-consensual. If this bothers you I'd skip it and move on. You'll get the jist of what happened.]

NARRATOR

_**There are some people who say that life**_

_** is an illusion, and that reality is simply**_

_** a figment of our imaginations. If this**_

_** is so, then Zelgadis and Lina are quite safe.**_

_** However, the sudden departure of their**_

_** host and his 'creation' (into the seclusion**_

_** of his sombre bridal suite) had left them**_

_** feeling both apprehensive and uneasy.**_

_** A feeling which grew as the other guests**_

_** departed and they were sequestered to their**_

_** separate rooms.**_

I was vaguely aware of being shuffled around and tossed over someone's shoulder like a sack of potatoes. In the edges of unconsciousness I could hear the buzz of voices. One was uncomfortably familiar. A breathy female voice raised in concern then another, deep, male and… sexy? I felt a presence near me and breath on my ear, my eyes flew open and I thrust my fist out but no one was there. I was alone on the floor in an insanely decadent bedroom, my heart hammering in my chest. My lab coat was gone but I was mostly dry. How long had I been out? I felt that there was something important I was missing. Looking around I drank in the surroundings. In the very center of the room was a large four poster bed swathed in layers of transparent silks. I was kneeling on a plush, detailed rug and the lamps were blown from red glass, casting a rosy glow on everything they touched. Something was missing. I looked around again. A door. There was no door. I looked at the ceiling. Other than a tasteless mural that I refused to blush over, I couldn't see any tell-tale cracks or seams that would make a trap door. The only other unusual thing was the large slate of black glass with tubes wrapped around the sides. It looked similar to a contraption from the Lab.

Something else nagged at the back of my mind. Something important. "Gourry!" I gasped and was instantly on my feet. This proved to be a bad idea as the world swirled around me and I staggered, gripping a bedpost for support as the room started the weave and blur, the floor tilting under my feet. I clung to the post my eyes squeezed shut. Okay, that definitely hadn't improved. I sunk onto the bed, my palms pressed over my eyes willing the blood to stop singing through my ears. I felt dreadful, now that I thought about it; like someone had beat me with a stick and hung me out to dry. The taste in my mouth was thick and awful. If I laid down a minute maybe I'd feel better.

I heard a creak, soft and deliberate; it came from behind me.

"Lina?"

I let out the breath I'd unconsciously been holding. "Zel, how'd you get in here?" I sat up; everything was still blurry.

"The doors are all hidden in the walls. This place is insane, like a maze." I felt the bed sink as he climbed on behind me. "Lina, are you alright?"

"Yeah, just give me a minute… Gods, I don't know how long I was out. We've got to rescue Gourry from that… that… depraved son of a bitch. Gotta get my head clear." The pounding intensified and I pressed my palms into my eyes the pressure causing little stars to erupt.

"It's a side effect of the medication. You're not reacting well to it at all, Lina-san." He crept a little closer, the bed sinking from his weight.

My heart started to pound, adrenaline clearing my head; since when was Zel into honorifics? I reached behind me to halt his progress. My hand met with his chest, but the skin was smooth and giving; very un-Zel like. I whirled to find myself nose to nose with Xelloss.

"Y-You!" He caught my wrist, holding my hand to his chest as I tried to pull away.

"Did you like my Zelgadis-san impression? It was very good, yes?" His other arm snaked around my waist; I dug my nails into the offending limb. The blood was rushing in my ears, I could hardly hear over my thudding heartbeat. He leaned forward, nixing the minuscule distance between us and pecked me on the lips.

I clamped down hard on my emotions even as my face started to burn. _He just wants a rise out of you, Lina, don't give him the satisfaction._ I laughed, it sounded high but surprisingly natural. "Haha, yeah. I wasn't expecting it, I'll give you that." His eyes were open and boring into mine, I bit my trembling lip and tasted the cloying sweetness that lingered from his kiss, it tasted a little like that honey drink...

"So… You want to tell me what's going on? Mind clueing me in on why you threw this sick little party , what was in that 'medication', and what you did with Gourry?"

He giggled. "Ah, Lina-san, must it always be business with you?" He pulled me closer. My muscles absolutely screamed in an effort to pull away. "Wouldn't you like to have a little _pleasure_ every once in a while?" My mind flashed to his creepy comment from earlier: _By night I'm one hell of a lover. _My head started swimming again.

I struggled to find my voice. "W-well you k-know, this evening's been pretty bizarre even for-"

"Even for a 'depraved son of a bitch' like me?" He breathed in my ear and ran a finger up my spine. Oh! Ew, ew, ew!

"…yes." Argh! I had meant to put some heat and defiance into that one syllable, but instead I whimper it out like a scared little kid. He laughed. His breath was cold on my neck.

He laughed again and threw me down on the bed with a stomach lurching jerk, pinning my wrists to my sides. He straddled me before I regained my bearings. My innards turned to ice and my heart beat a violent tattoo against my ribcage. I'm sure he could hear it from the way he was smiling, but he continued the conversation as if the shift in positions had never taken place.

"Hmm… as for your friend, " strange emphasis on friend, "he's currently enjoying a nap. He just isn't my type. You should know." He berated me, frowning. "I only joined in on the party because I thought it would be fun." He shifted his hips and I gasped as he ground up against me. The panic started to well, deep in my belly. It felt like I'd been forced to swallowed live bees. He smiled, and leaned forward, digging his fingers into the tendons in my wrist causing my eyes to water. His chest pressed against mine and he ran his lips along my ear lobe, nipping it with his teeth. My vision was hazy, but I locked eyes on one of the bed masts trying desperately not to look at him. "Besides," he breathed in my ear, "I was feeling a bit peckish."

A new emotion roared through the gibbering tangled mash of others. He wasn't... Was he saying he was here, doing all of this just- just for this? Taking advantage of me because he was hungry? The anger was like heat, flashing through my body but it had a distressing and not at all welcome side effect. Every nerve was suddenly on end, attuned to his presence; where his skin touched mine was burning. His was so cold. He laughed. This is what he wanted. Anyone who knew anything about Mazoku knew they fed off the negative emotions humans give off, and Xelloss was looking at me like I was a seven course feast, complete with dessert.

I had to stop being so tasty. I tried to block the panicked stream of emotions that welled from deep within me. If his goal was just to get a scrumptious snack then I was hardly going to make it easy on him. He sat up and smiled down on me, mocking my progress. I writhed; trying my damnedest to break his death grip. But I was tired before and my body was wearing out on me. Another derisive chuckle.

"You had a whole castle full of people to torture earlier, why'd you suddenly decided now you were hungry?" I demanded my voice full of its normal heat. I glared. Focusing on getting information out of Xelloss distracted me.

"Ah, but Lina-chan, that's hardly playing by the proper rules."

"What rules?" I demanded.

"Ah. That," he breathed as he started to very slowly, deliberately pull my arms up, until my wrists met above my head. "Is a secret." He clamped down on my wrists with one strong hand and leered over me. The red light washed over him, casting eerie shadows, making him look jagged and evil. The dam I had hastily constructed the hold back my emotions cracked as Xelloss used his free hand to, er, explore. He less than gently caressed my curves, running his and down my side, his fingertips digging hard into my waist and lingering far too long on the elastic at my hips.

Focus Lina!

"So t-this is playing by the rules, huh?" The voice that came from my mouth didn't even sound like mine. It was calmer than I felt, but much too high and ragged.

The fingertips paused in their absent study of the lacy ties that held my panties together. Xelloss' expression had yet to change. An eyebrow quirked but the lazy, amused smile stayed the same. As if I were a puppy doing tricks for him. He thought for a second, his fingers slowly plucking at the lace.

"Well, now, Lina-chan. One needs to learn the difference between bending the rules and breaking them." Smile.

Well, hell, thanks a lot for the philosophy lesson, professor. Got anything more concrete?

His smile turned more leering. "Perhaps if you just… relaxed," He pressed his hips into me and I shuddered despite all my best efforts. "You might get into the swing of things, yes?"

Shit, this was vague even for Xelloss. And I sure as hell didn't want to relax into anything he had for me.

"Hmm…" He continued, his voice thoughtful. The red light seemed to intensify, distorting his features, yet his demeanor was chatty and pleasant. The conversation was totally at odds with the bruising grip he kept on my wrists. "Think of it like you're an actor in a play, Lina-chan. And you do want to do a good job." The last line was every word a threat.

"Let's continue, shall we?"

"What? N-" I gasped as he abandoned my hips and moved his hand back up to my chest.

_Okay, I need an idea._ I frantically cast around in my mind, trying desperately to ignore his cold hands on my delicate lady bits and his delighted eyes boring into me like I was delicious roast meat for sale at a street vender. What happens now?

_Well…_ one voice popped up… _it looks like Xelloss is about his have his way with you._

NOT WANTED, YOU!

Even less helpful: _The great doctor is about to educate you in the beautiful carnal arts of lust and desire. _

What the hell? Where was this coming from?

I need another idea! Anything. But all that came to mind were trash copper novels I read out of extreme boredom. This sort of stuff happened all the time. The bad guy kidnaps the beautiful princess and as he's about to have his way with her the hero kicks his ass, rescuing her. Then they have a sweaty tumble on the floor. That's just as damn useless… Wait.

Hero rescues the girl.

Hero.

"GOURRY!" I shrieked at the top of my lungs. I mean, far be it for me to play the damsel in distress card but I didn't see how I was going to get out of here without maybe just a tiny bit of assistance.

Xelloss just laughed. "Oh he can't hear you." He drug his fingernails down my abdomen, drawing long streaks of blood. I grit my teeth and squirmed but was otherwise silent. He watched the blood well up and trickle down my sides, again with that mildly amused smile. "It's just you and me. All. Night. Long."

"Wha…what the hell! Why are you doing this?" I blurted out.

"Why?" His tone was so amused. "Well, I suppose you have caused us a lot of problems over the last few years." Well, yes there was that. Does that mean he's going to kill me? Just like that? Oh… oh shit. I didn't really want to die a virgin. _Well. Guess you won't have to worry about that,_ mocking inner-Lina sarcasmed.

"That and it fits perfectly into the scheme of things at the moment, so why not just use this to my advantage?"

"What the hell are you talking about?" I was losing control over my fear.

"Oh, Lina-chan." Mocking chuckle. "That is a secret." Of course. Of fucking course. He smiled and smiled then bent down and licked at one of the wells of blood. Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah…

"Besides," he switched topics, "do you want your little friend to see you like this?" He countered forcing his knee between my legs and pulling me up against him. Only a couple layers of dinky cloth were separating me from something I really didn't want to think about. He licked my own blood off his lips. Time to hyperventilate.

"Like this? Like how!" My almost tear inducing fear was instantly replaced with white hot rage. Maybe it wasn't helpful with the whole 'Don't feed the Mazoku after midnight' thing, but definitely better than crying like some weepy damsel. "Like I would ever, EVER, touch you without being drugged and tied down you deranged piece of trash!"

Xelloss' cheerful, amused smile was suddenly a lot less cheerful. "Ah, Lina-chan, am I really such a bad guy?" _YES. Yes you are. _"I just want us to have a little fun together."

His free hand moved south. Very south. I squirmed, clamping down hard on all my emotions. He pouted. "Don't you want to have fun, Lina-chan?"

"Not your kind of fun." I growled. He slipped his hand under the elastic of my silky underthings. I focused very hard on the bed post. I'd always had a good imagination, it was time to put it to work. I wasn't here, I was in the inn, having a bad dream. Hell, I was on the forest floor, one hand clutching the offending mushroom I MUST have eaten, hallucinating like mad. I certainly wasn't here, with Xellos' hand in my panties, twirling his fingers through my hair. Nope. Not now, not ever.

He slipped one finger, then another inside me. It was suddenly very hard to breathe. I noticed a chip on the bed post and a bit of wood grain that looked like a bunny. A bunny with an extra foot. The cold fingers moved deeper; I bit my lip, my eyes watered.

"Why Lina!" Was the much too delighted cry of _not_ Xellos, who was _not there_. "You're still a virgin!" I shivered, biting my lip harder. "Well this certainly changes things. I never would have thought." He chuckled. "I guess Gourry-san's swordplay could never, ah… penetrate your overpowering charm." He slowly twirled the offending digits.

I tried very hard to focus on that bunny, which was starting to get a little blurry.

"You are such a bastard…" I hissed. What was Gourry supposed to do again?

"I am, aren't I?" Smiles all around. I made the mistake of looking at him, hunched over me, one hand keeping a bruising grip on my wrist, the other. I didn't really want to think about the other. He leered over me, smiling, smiling, smiling. "I bet that's a succulent cherry you've got, Lina-chan."

Have I mentioned yet that it was hard to breathe? I could hardly draw breath. I was panting in short, ragged gasps that made my chest ache. Everything ached, for that matter, but the lack of oxygen and the stench of miasma was making me even more light headed. Xellos released my arms and I bolted upright, trying to get away. He just laughed and clamped his hand down on my thigh, pulling me hard against him.

"In fact, I think I might have a little taste." He leaned forward and pressed his lips against mine in a long, slow, disgusting, soul wrenching, tear inducing kiss. He moved down and then pressed them against my jugular, running them along my collar bone. I shoved as hard as I could on his shoulders to get him away from me. He pushed back and drug his lips down my chest, pausing to harass my left nipple. I managed to land a sweet punch on the side of his head, bruising two knuckles. His lip on lip molestation had left a lingering taste that made me nauseous again. The medication? Was he going to drug me into compliance? If Xellos just wanted his way with me, there wasn't much I could do about it at the moment. Why was he insisting I play along, nay, ask for it? To humiliate me?

"Really, Lina, must I tie you down?" Both hands were back on my hips, pulling me against him. He ground his hips and I punched him again. Man, they were weak little punches too; Xellos had drained so much out of me I couldn't even fight back. I gasped as he moved his hips against me.

Urgh, I could feel it; it was wrong and disgusting and why the hell hasn't someone resc- uh, intervened on my behalf, yet?

"Lina-chan, you're supposed to be playing along." He frowned. "I'm even being nice to you."

"NICE?" I shrieked, enraged. _Shit, if this was nice, then…_

"Well, you aren't curled up in a ball, crying, and begging to die like you could be." He shrugged. I gulped; that was a hell of reminder what kind of position I was in. Xelloss I guess felt the need to remind me of my lowly status every once in a while. At the very least it didn't sound like he was going to kill me. Very, very least. "Soo…" He quirked the eyebrow of question. "

I knew what he wanted me to do. I knew that I didn't want to do what he wanted me to do, but here he was insinuating that if I didn't do what he wanted me to do, he would do it to me in a way I would not like and I was supposed to enjoy it? Where were these stupid thoughts coming from? This 'medication' must be a mind control drug. No, that's not right… It was more like an… open to really vague, haunting suggestion drug. Like the ones that floated out of the darkness. Not that I had been doing so hot with the thinking in the last couple of hours, but I found my mind drifting into uncomfortable numbness. Not the fun kind where I couldn't feel anything, but the kind that left me clearly aware of my surroundings: the cold hands gliding down my inner thighs, the sickly sweet taste in my mouth, and the glaring red lights, but my brain couldn't really comprehend what it meant. Part of me was still shivering with revulsion but the weird haunting voice in the darkness was enjoying itself immensely, with little oohs, and ahhs, and yeses; the whole romance novel lexicon which didn't amount to much beyond cliché lines.

The voice got shrill with delight as Xellos nipped his way down my chest, my belly, and paused at my hips. I dug my fingernails impotently into the tendons of his shoulder, my other hand clutching at my throat. I closed my eyes because I really didn't want to watch as he undid the lacy ties on my panties and slid them off so deliberately. And then, slowly, savoring every second he slid his tongue into the place I wanted it least of all. It was freakishly hot and I don't even know how to describe how disgusting, and wrong, and all those other adjectives I can't think of at the moment, it was. The voice that haunted me from the edges of unconsciousness got louder with her little cries of ecstasy (oh yes! Yes! Oh, faster!) and I fell deeper into the mind-numbing blackness. If I focused on how absolutely annoying the breathy, girly voice was I could almost calm my emotions. It was as if my body wasn't completely my own and it started to… uh… respond to the attentions.

"You're wet, Lina-chan." Xellos purred. I was pulled a little closer to reality. Just enough to hate myself a little bit. He dove back in with vigor and I clutched at my face, covering my eyes. Xellos chuckled. "I think it's my turn now."

He leered forward and grabbed one of my hands, pulling it down on his junk. I went from tomato red to ashen gray immediately. That thing… What the hell has he been hiding in his trousers all along? Well, I guess since his from doesn't exist on this plane it could be any size he wanted. The rational part of me wondered if it would fit, the rest of me wanted to crawl in a hole and cry, that voice just made an appreciative little 'ooh'.

He loomed, everything got dark and hazy, but I could see his smile clearly in the gloom. I panicked, pure and simple. Sure, my body felt primed and that annoying voiced lady was good to go, but never in my wildest nightmares had I foreseen such a scenario.

He slid down his pants and I looked out of morbid curiosity, but everything was in shadow. He pushed the tip of it against me. "I'm so happy to be your first." My brain might as well have been pudding as I mouthed a silent prayer for the damned.

"Master. Come in, Master." I've never been so happy to hear Amelia's voice, even if it sounded all distorted and commanding.

Time slowed to a halt. Xellos froze in place and frowned. "Mmm… yes?"

"Master, the new playmate has broken his chains and vanished. He is loose on the castle grounds. Naga has just released the dogs."

Sigh. "Coming." Xellos sounded so put out. He leaned forward and whispered in my ear. "You are a mighty lucky creature, Lina Inverse." And then, without flash or fanfare he disappeared. It was as if he had never been there to begin with.

Maybe I could get myself to believe that as I lay on the bed wide-eyed, my sight trained on the silk-blurred monstrosity of a painting above me. I closed my eyes for just a moment. The nagging voice was temporarily silent and the nausea was going away, but something kept nagging at me. Something important. Something I wanted, perhaps? Or needed?

_Hey dipshit, why don't you wake up! Gourry escaped. Go find his ass and get out of here!_

Oh yeah.


	6. Chapter 6a: The Seductioning

Gourry was more than a little confused. This was not a state that was foreign to him, but this was a special case.

The day had started out all right: a walk in the forest, heading to some secret hideout to nab some treasure, chatting with Lina. He and Amelia fell behind as Amelia was trying to explain to him how justice could right any wrongs just like a hammer or something. It sounded more like Lina to take a hammer to things that weren't working out, but he didn't think Amelia would appreciate his comparison so he just tried to follow along the best he could. When he finally gave up and turned to ask his travel companions a very salient question, Amelia was gone, the path they had been steadily treading was gone and the forest was eerily quiet. There was no sign of Lina or Zelgadis either. A strange haze had fallen over the surroundings and he could see shapes shifting in the shadows of the trees. He drew his sword started by the sudden change.

The shapes started to consolidate until it looked like a huge room lay beyond the trees. It had a checkered floor and tall marble columns. It looked empty. He strained his ears for any sign of his missing companions, but something told him they were nowhere near.

He frowned: magically appearing rooms were Lina's territory. He wasn't sure what to do with it.

He squinted again at the improbable room; another shape was moving. He shifted his stance, as the darkness gave way to a figure. Old fashinoned gas-lamps flickered to life, the light bouncing off the walls and unseen ceiling revealing an extravagant ballroom. He could make out the shape of a tall woman slowly sauntering across the tiles. She stopped at the edge of the forest, lingering in the shadows of the trees. Gourry lowered his sword. "Um… hello?"

"Hello." She purred.

"Oh, hi!" He said brightly.

"Can I help you with something?" Came the same low purr.

"Well… I've lost my friends. Have you seen them?"

The lady chuckled. "Oh, I miiiight have seen them… somewhere."

"Great! …Um… where?"

"Come a little closer." She whispered. Gourry paused then cautiously walked towards her. The trees were denser and darker than they looked from his small clearing and the walk to the room stretched farther than his eye told him it should. He never sheathed his sword even though the lady never made a move towards him. This could always be a trap.

Finally he stepped on the tile floor and things were suddenly brighter. The columns and floor gleamed in the large lamps. He noticed the lady was a maid. Well, dressed like a maid. And she had a huge rack. He sheathed his sword and walked towards her.

"Well, aren't you handsome." She threw back her long dark hair, poised the back of her hand at her mouth and laughed a high, shrill laugh that echoed round the chamber.

"Um, thank you?" He wanted to cringe when she laughed again. "So… you said you'd seen some people in the forest?"

"What forest?" She said with and air of someone who knew exactly what he was talking about and was poorly denying it.

He frowned. Surely she could see. "Um…" He turned to point it out, but he was a little ruffled when he found the trees had been replaced by a silk covered wall. "There was a forest a second ago." He finished lamely.

"OOOOH HO HO HO HOOO!" Gourry cringed this time.

"Where am I?" He decided ignoring the laugh would be the best thing to do.

"You got here. Maybe _**you**_ should know." Gourry didn't understand her tone of maddening superiority or the smirk. She's the one that beckoned him over. He didn't have time to play games. Who knows what sort of trouble Lina was likely to be in by now. He spotted a door on the opposite wall.

"Well… thanks, but I've got to go." He started to stride past her towards the door, but a sleek leather gloved hand pressed into his chest. His gaze followed the slender arm up to…

"Now, now. Leaving so soon?" She eyed him sideways. He shifted his eyes away from her cleavage, his cheeks pink.

"I've got to find someone." She again thwarted his attempt to leave, this time standing in front of him and pressing her amble bosom against his chest, her fingers twisting a long strand of his golden hair; she was nearly eye to eye with him. He cleared his throat and resisted looking down.

"Ooooh?" Her long fingers ran up his chest and pulled his collar open. He felt heat on his face and backed away. "I'm sure it's nothing pressing. You have time for a glass of wine with me. You will drink to my beauty! I will not accept no for an answer."

He was flustered, sure; it's not every day a well-endowed lady presses her assets against you and demands you drink to her. Just one drink. "Okay."

With more force than he expected she backed him against the silk wall. Her eyes never leaving his she started to unbutton his shirt. "W-wait a minute. I don't even know you! I mean, I'll have a drink, sure…" Not that she wasn't good looking; you rarely see curves like that on a woman. Or tits. Huge melons of soft jiggling flesh just waiting for him to… And perhaps it would be rude for him to just push her away. Well, he thought, she's being kind of pushy. Kind of like Lina…

"Really, I-" He wasn't sure what he was going to say, but he sidestepped around her keeping just out of her reach after her hand strayed a little too far into his waistband. "I'vegottago." He mumbled. Something about her made him uncomfortable. She pouted and strode purposely over to a small table. She uncorked the decanter and sniffed it then licked her lips very slowly, deliberately. It was starting to feel a little hot in the room.

"You did say you'd have a drink." She said as you poured a generous glass of what looked like liquid gold. "Hmmm?"

She handed him the delicate crystal glass, her full red lips still in a pout, but her eyes were narrowed slyly. "Drink it."

Gourry gulped, not sure how he could turn down such a demand, and not taking his eyes off her ruby pout downed the entire contents. It was good. Really good.

"Would you like some more?" The maid purred, waving the decanter and shaking her hips. Even with his shirt hanging loose he was feeling uncomfortably warm.

He nodded. She beckoned him with a long, slender finger and he came obediently. He was already feeling the drink. She poured until the glass almost ran over. Gourry drank it quickly out of nervousness. This probably wasn't a very good idea. Lina certainly would approve of him drinking with this lady and her huge boobs. He didn't usually drink that much anyway. At least not around Lina. He'd drunkenly cornered her one too many times. Sure, that last time she didn't seem to mind until someone else walked into the bath. The handprint she left didn't fade for days.

He decided that he probably shouldn't have drunk the strange drink that after the corners of the room started to blur. He knew he definitely shouldn't have drunk it after his knees gave out and the fell kneeling at the maid's feet. He grasped her soft thighs for support and leaned his head into her skirt. This probably would look really bad if anyone walked in.

"What… what did you…"

She leaned back into a full body guffaw. Her eyes closed, hand poised and she really put her heart and soul into it.

"OOOOOHHHH HO HO HO HO HO HO HOOOO! Foolish simpleton! Did you think, even for a second, that Lina Inverse's lapdog stood a chance against her most beautiful and powerful rival, Naga the White Serpent? OOOOOOH HO HO HO HOOOO! "

Gourry fought the wave of faintness that overtook him, but in the end it won. _Lina…_

When he woke up, he was very confused. There were flashing lights and screaming and singing and some man in lady's clothing was getting a bit too touchy-feely with him.

The guy in lady's undergarments dragged him around to Lina and Zel who were there, both in their underwear too. He was in tiny golden pants and he wasn't sure how they had got there. Lina and Zel looked kind of sick and scared. Lina was really pale and wet. Gourry himself was feeling kind of ill and weak. He didn't know where he was and he couldn't get back to Lina to ask her. He had the strangest, strongest urge to play along with the singing, dancing crowed and to make the sparkly man happy. He ran around a bit then jumped back in the tank he had first found himself. Some guy flew around on the back of a machine, destroying stuff. Gourry had the strangest idea that he knew that guy… He had no idea what was going on. He kept looking at Lina, hoping she would tell him.

Next thing he knew he had been enticed out of the tank, more singing, and then music began to play. This song… it was very familiar. The underwear lady-guy linked arms with him and marched him across the room like a showdog through a crowd that threw confetti and rice. Gourry blanched. He knew this song. He knew why people marched down isles to it and why people threw things.

"Lina! Lina! Lina, save me! Lina, please!" He waved frantically to get her attention. She lurched forward after them, but the crowd closed in, blocking her. Over their heads he saw a lady in a maids costume pin Lina.

He was dragged out of sight of Lina and thrown on a large bed. The décor was pretty tacky, even for bad-guy standards, and this guy had to be bad. He heard a faint tinkling sound and felt something slide around his ankles. Delicate silver chains connected him to the iron posts of the bed. He snorted and pulled against them, but they held tight.

The entire room started to spin around atop the dais, closing the wall and cutting him off from all outside sounds.

Gourry fought at his bindings, pulling as hard as he could. The strange man chuckled and lounged against a wall. "Now, Gourry-san, we can do this the easy way, or we can do this the fun way."

"Where's Lina?" He demanded.

The man sauntered up, his eyes were constantly closed, but his smile was big and creepy. "Oh, you and Lina-chan will be getting veeeery close in just a little while." He lounged against a bed post, leering towards his captive. "But first," the smile widened, "I'll have to, uh… get to know her a little better. You know," he licked his lips slowly, "loosen her up."

"Stay away from Lina!" The man just oozed perversity.

"Or what?" He mocked. "I'll catch what she has?" Mocking chuckle.

Gourry's next words caught in his throat. He didn't know what to say. Here he was swordless and chained to a satin lined bed by some pervert who had something bad in store for Lina. He could honestly say he'd never been in such a position before. It was also getting harder to ignore the feeling that all he wanted to do was sleep after a hectic day of pleasing his "master". This was perhaps as unsettling as the scary man and his plans for Lina.

"Well, moonlight's a wastin'." He stretched. "I better go attend to my, hmmhmm, guests."

Gourry panicked. "Wait! Before you go, I have to know…"

The man arched an eyebrow. "Hmm…?"

"Who are you?"

The man wobbled a little, a small sweatdrop rolling down his cheek. "Ah, Gourry-san… That is a secret." With that the man touched a lace gloved finger to Gourry's forehead, sending him into a deep sleep.


	7. Chapter 6b: Family Reunion

"Gourry-san! Zelgadis-san! Lina-san!" Amelia paced through the dense trees. She was wondering around with no path and no sign of her companions. A strong wind had picked up blowing in dark storm clouds. She could hear thunder in the distance.

She had already climbed the highest tree and could see nothing but forest in all directions- except for a giant castle not too far away. She knew everyone would be there: there was nowhere else to go. She tried to stifle her irritation at being left behind and couldn't shake the nagging feeling that maybe something had happened to them. Considering she was with Lina-san it could be any number of bad things. She couldn't count how many uncomfortable, dangerous, or down right deadly situations Lina-san had gotten her (and everyone else) into. But, again, Lina-san always got them back out again so no lasting harm done. Well. Maybe a little. Rain started to fall, slapping loudly against the leafy canopy. Amelia picked up the pace until she saw a tall iron fence. Dashing towards the fence the trees cleared and she could see a giant stone wall beyond. This was it! This was surely the lair of the evil count!

She eyed the fence; a little levitation was all she needed to be inside. Maybe she should wait for Lina and the others, but, then again, think of how proud Lina would be if Amelia got rid of the bad-guys for her! It was decided. She whipped Levitation around herself and floated over the spiked iron barrier. She had just cleared the top when her spell gave a little wobble. Uh-oh… She focused harder only to feel the power fade from the spell. She dropped fifteen feet like a rock, landing face-first in the mud. Rain pattered harder on her upturned backside. She groaned and sat up, using her cloak to wipe the mud from her eyes. She looked up, squinting into the rain. Her magic stopped working? She tried a few simple spells, but nothing worked. What had happened? She still had at least a week until that-time-of-the-month. It had to be something else.

It rained harder and harder, the sky darkening by the second. Something bad was happening here, prickling in the back of her mind. Something evil was in this castle. She may not be able to use her magic but she still had justice on her side!

She dashed around the soggy grounds until she saw a door. She purposely marched up to the rough-hewn wood and grabbed the door knocker. She hastily let go when she saw it was a rather detailed relief of two people doing something that very not appropriate for public and certainly not something you would hang on you door. They had to be evil!

She heard voices from inside muffled by the door. Someone was yelling!

"-can't believe you! You promised me her head and I'm not waiting another minute! You lured me here on false pretenses and I'm–" The door was wrenched open exposing a screaming, red-faced woman. "LEAVE…ing…" Her voice trailed away when she saw Amelia.

The screaming woman jumped back, her tightly wound blue tinted curls sway madly, but her face was obscured by the brim of a lopsided top hat. "Huh?"

Amelia jumped back accusatory finger raised and struck a dramatic pose. Was this the count? "Evil fiend! How day you entice me into your forest with falsified tales! I Ame-"

"Who the hell are you calling evil fiend! I'm not taking that from some muddy peasant." She looked taken aback then scowled. "Are you trying to win a wet tunic contest or something?" Amelia was thrown off by the interruption but looked down all the same. She gasped and crossed her arms. Her sodden white garb was completely transparent and clung to her equally sodden undergarments.

She turned red and stammered for a response. "This is your fault! Your evil actions called for recourse and I have come to-"

"You're out of your mind! I don't even live here. I only want one thing, and that's-" she clenched her fist dramatically, "-REVENGE! I'll pay that red-headed bitch back if it's the last thing I do!"

Red-headed bitch? She couldn't be talking about… "Ne, what do you want with Lina-san?"

The woman jumped out of the doorway and grabbed Amelia by the shoulders and shook her. "You know where Lina is! Tell me! I'll make it worth your whi- Heeeeey, I know you." She drawled, squiting into Amelia's muddied face. Amelia suddenly realized the same.

"Aren't you-" They said at the same time.

The top-hat girl broke out in a sly, cat-like smile. "Oh, my goodness, it's been too long! How nice to see you!" She then grabbed Amelia by the arm and hauled her inside. "Come in! Come in! Let's get you into something warm and dry! Come with me." Amelia stammered a protest as she was physically dragged through a room full of dead animal heads then up a grand staircase with molting crimson velvet draped down the rails. With a powerful shove Amelia was propelled into a small, decadently furnished chamber. Everything was gilded and faceted crystal fixture glittered like diamonds.

"Wow…" She'd never seen such a nice room: not even in Sailoon's grand castle. It might be a tad bit gaudy for a princess, though. The top-hat girl, Amelia really wished she could remember her name, indicated a painted silk dressing screen and Amelia gratefully hid behind. Luckily they had encountered no one in the castle.

"Let's see," mused the girl. "Here! I bet this would be a perfect fit!" A few garments were flung over the screen. "I sent for something warm to be brought up for you! We can't have you catching a cold."

"Oh, thank you! I don't want to be any trouble, I'm just here to…"

"Oh ho ho! No trouble, no trouble!" The girl purred.

Amelia sighed and peeled off her tunic. Wasn't she here to fight some evil; how come this girl was being so nice? Was it a trap? Well, she couldn't very well fight evil in such scandalous attire. She wiggled her way out of her boots and trousers and picked at her sodden undergarments finally shedding those too. She pulled down the fresh clothes and shuffled through them. What a strange frock. It looked familiar, but she couldn't place it. When she held up the jacket for inspection a small wad of lace tumbled out. She unraveled it and blushed a deep scarlet. This wasn't the sort of thing a princess, nay, a champion of justice should wear! But her's were wet… Sighing she pulled on the little ball of lace that left nothing to the imagination and quickly put the high-waisted trousers on over it. No one would have to know. She dug through the clothes and to her dismay found no matching bra. She shook her head and pulled on the blouse. It would have to do. She was just pulling on a pair of boots that miraculously fit when she heard someone coming up the stairs.

"Your drink, madam." And a tray was slid behind the screen.

"Oh, thank you! I'll be out in a bit." Amelia sat on a pouf as she laced up the boots then reached for the drink. How pretty! It was in a glittering goblet and shimmered like liquid jewels. Looking at it reminded her how hungry and thirsty she was; besides, nothing _that_ pretty could be bad. She took a tentative sip. "Mmm… Wow! This is so good! What is it?" She downed the rest of the goblet in a very unladylike way then stepped around the screen the silliness of the outfit forgotten. "That was delicious, what…" Her breath caught in her throat when she saw who waited on the other side; her fragile goblet tumbled onto the carpet. "Gracia!"

Amelia started the maid into dropping the delicate crystal phallus she had been examining. It landed with a thunk on the carpeted floor. "Um…" The woman glanced behind herself and, upon seeing no one else, assumed Amelia had been screaming at her.

"I think you're mistake-"

"Gracia! It's been so long; father and I have been… won…der…ing…" The shimmering golden room started to erupt into blurry sparkles. Amelia grabbed a spindly table for support. What had she been saying? It seemed important.

"Oh dear," the maid cried in mock distress, "you're coming over faint! Here, have some of this, it'll cure you!" Amelia gratefully took the shiny thing that was held up to her face. It smelled sweet and warmed her throat, but the maid was wrong. Everything was getting blurrier and blurrier. She fell to her knees then landed face first in the plush carpet. Maybe this had been a trap after all…

Amelia paced in front of the control panel, a look of snarling discontent etched onto her normally smiling face. She glanced over to Gourry, snoring into the satin bedclothes. Something had been chewing at her the whole day, but now she was furious. Seeing the doctor prance around with some golden haired rock-head had just pushed her over the edge. They had a job to do (whatever it was), damn it, and he was ruining everything! Now he expected her to sit here and babysit while he terrorized his pathetic "guests".

She straitened her frock coat violently and pushed her shoulders back. No matter, this could easily be dealt with. She nodded at Naga, who gave a dark smile back and marched towards their sleeping victim.

Gourry moaned and strained against his chains in his sleep. Naga snapped the ends of the silver chains from the bedposts with little effort. Amelia picked up a large candelabra and brandished it towards him with a vile grin. Gourry awoke with a gasp, pain searing his side. He jumped away from the flames.

"Amelia, w-what- what are you doing?" This certainly didn't compute. Amelia laughed as he backed away into something fleshy and soft. He caught sight of ample cleavage in his peripheral vision. The owner of this cleavage shoved him back towards Amelia with a snort of laughter. He tripped over the bed, the chains dragging on the sheets. Amelia snarled and lunged towards him with the candelabra again. Gourry jumped from the bed and leapt down from the dais as Amelia and the busty woman advanced, smiling.

"Amelia, what's wrong?" He backed into the giant tank then sidestepped around it, leaving it between him and his pursuers. "Why are you doing this? That guy! That guy from before, he's a monster guy! Why are you with a monster like him?" He saw her maniacal expression slacken, a flicker of panic in her eyes, she slowed. He let out a tense breath. He wasn't sure why he was running from her, she wasn't using magic or anything. He took a tentative step towards her. "Lina… do you know-"

The busty woman cut him off with a horrible screeching laugh. This shook Amelia out of, or rather back into, her reverie. She hitched her lopsided, creepy leer back on and rushed towards Gourry. He ran for it, seeing his only escape as the gated lift shaft. He wrenched open the metal grill and climbed down, the chains on his legs rattling against the metal sides. Amelia laughed and threw a candlestick down the shaft at him, showering him with hot wax. What was going on!

He jumped the last floor landing with a thud as unhinged laughter bounced from the upper floor and took off running.

Amelia laughed long and hard as his blonde head whipped out of sight and turned to Naga. Naga sauntered up swinging her hips and the met in the middle of the room. Both raised their hands above their heads and placed them together, rolling their arms down until their elbows touched.

Gourry pelted out the first door he saw, ending up in a courtyard surrounded with tall pointed iron fences. He ran around the perimeter looking for a way out, but frantic barking followed close behind him. The fence was never ending as he ran around and around the building, never finding a gate. The hounds gained on him, snarling on his heels and snapping. Another jumped from nowhere and tried to knock him from his feet, he staggered as the dogs snapped and scrabbled at his bare skin. He pelted in the first door he saw and slammed it behind him. He was back where he began.

With a sigh, he rested against the door. He was bleeding from multiple shallow wounds and was cold and lightheaded. He needed somewhere safe and warm to hide. He was tired of running. He could only think of one place. The last place anyone would suspect.

Author's Notes: Next chapter lives up to it's ratings! Tehe and all that. Almost finished.


	8. Chapter 7: Toucha Toucha Touch me!

I paced down a long dark hallway wearing the latest in bed sheet chic. I had the red satin doubled around my waist, but it still trailed behind me like a train. I pressed against the wall to take the weight off my quivering knees, my ears strained for any rustle or step. I was trembling from head to toe and felt cold and scared. There were wavering ghosts in the edges of my vision and a throbbing warmth in my belly. I tried to ignore it, but my mind kept turning back to the cherry colored boudoir with its silk-swathed bed and my visitor. I wanted a bath. I wanted to soak in the hot water for hours. Days even. I felt dirty. His touch was revolting and his intent more so but the drugs that lingered on his lips and sang through my blood has caused my body to betray me and all I craved now was release. I had to get out of here before Xellos came back.

At the end of the hallway a glowing rectangle of light looked like a portal into another world. I slid towards it as silently as I could. I made it to the door and pressed my eye to the crack. I pried it open by millimeters to see the same glaring pink from before. Chancing it I pushed it open. The lab was empty. All that remained of the freakshow was the covered tank and the flashing machine. No dancing, no singing, no drug crazed princesses or mad scientists.

This huge room must be the center of the castle. The ceiling rose in a great dome and the center pressing upwards like a tower. The tank was centered, the machine right beside. I headed straight for the machine with all its flashing lights and buttons. It had to be important the way it drew my eye, but I couldn't explain why. I saw a blank black slate of crystal off to the side and twisted the dial beside it. It started to glow. I stepped back startled by violent zigzag lines that scrolled down the face. They cleared revealing another bedroom that was distressingly familiar. This one, however, was a cold blue, the light pouring from watery globes. The same bed was in the center, draped in silks. One figure was lounging comfortably, another was hunched at the end.

"Zel?" My breath fogged the glass as I stared at the hunched figure. Then the other- it couldn't be. Xellos shifted, bringing a cigarette to his dark crimson lips. Words were exchanged. Zel kept shooting nasty looks at the lounging figure. He was kneading his hands compulsively. Seeing this made my head hurt. Surely, surely Xel hadn't had a go at Zel. My brain couldn't handle that one. Xel passed his cigarette to his nervous companion; he took a long drag. I was going to have to have a very long, possibly very uncomfortable, interrogation later. I needed the truth before my imagination filled in the blanks for me.

I heard a faint sniffle. I turned back to survey the room, my eyes landing on the tank. The satin cover quivered. So, someone thought they could hide did they?

I crept towards it more stealthily than I thought I could manage. Maybe that damn drug was wearing off. My hands hovered over the satin cover still shaking slightly and snagged a fold. I whipped it off and gasped. Startled blue eyes locked onto mine. "Lina!"

"G…Gou-" He jumped up and reached towards me. My voice died, taking in his ravished appearance. He was bleeding from several shallow wounds and had smudges of dirt on his face and chest. "What are you doing in there?"

"Hiding." He answered in a small voice. His arms were outstretched, as if to embrace me. I watched the muscles ripple across his chest and suddenly I wanted nothing more than to feel those powerful arms around me, pulling me against his hard sweat glistening chest feeling the heat of his body melt away all my- I swallowed as I felt a particularly strong throb from down south. A physical reminder of a job left unfinished… _No, no, no. Ignore that. You want to leave._

Fighting against the foreign and distressingly strong urges that flowed within me I climbed into the tank. "How'd you get hurt?" Gourry never answered, but set back down in the tank. His eyes traveled down to rest on my hips where the sheet had slipped to reveal a lacy waistband. I hitched it up and knelt down in front of him. Not looking at him I tore a strip from the satin with my teeth and reached towards him with trembling hands. I wound it around the worst of the injuries on his upper arm. Only after I had knotted it did I look at him directly. "Well… I think we ought to get out of here and-"

He placed a hand on my exposed knee and his eyes bored into mine. My breath hitched at the sheer hunger in his gaze. I looked away quickly. He leaned towards me, his hand moving up my thigh. _Um…_ I laughed, but it was high and nervous. Was this really happening? Gourry was getting hot and bothered now? I didn't have the strength to beat him senseless but it looked like I was going to have to do it anyway. "Come on… l-lets go. We don't have time to mess a- to fool a-" My heart was beating hard and my skin tingled where his hand rested. _Fooling around might not be such a bad idea_, my inner, really horny Lina reminded me. "To be here." I finished lamely.

Gourry hadn't said a word, but his gaze was unwavering; he inched ever closer. I could smell musk and damp earth and a faint metallic whiff of blood. The combination was making me light-headed. He raised his other hand and placed it on my exposed chest, his fingers traced my collar bone and around the back of my neck. The tingling feeling made me gasp. No. No. No time for this. We had to… to do… What was I supposed to do? Of their own accord my fingers fumbled at the knot of the red satin sheet. It slid off pooling around us.

His hand grasped the back of my neck and pulled me closer, his other hand gliding up my thigh, his thumb sliding to the apex. His lips never touched mine but brushed against my jaw feather-light. I was quivering; I closed my eyes and dug my fingers into his powerful shoulders. I pushed him away but my arms were so weak they just shook. My heart was beating hard, each thud coupled with a deep pulse from below. There was a strange fullness I'd never felt before and an alien desire flooded through me. It wasn't like earlier; this time I wanted it, but I fought it all the same.

Gourry wasn't himself- it was like Amelia and Martina. He was just playing his part, just as Xellos told me to play mine, and he didn't have the willpower to deny his animal urges. I mean if some evil magic was giving you a guilt free way to get laid with excuse built-in, wouldn't you? Wait… I'm undermining my own argument.

"Gourry…I…wait…" I put a hand on his chest to slow him down. I licked my dry lips but only tasted the drug. I never imagined my first time would be like this, but- "Do you really want… I mean…" What did I mean? The longer I assessed the situation the less sense it made to resist. Gourry likely wouldn't remember the moment (I hoped) and I…

I needed a fuck.

As if he could sense my resolve melt, Gourry lunged forward. The next thing I knew I was on my back. I started to protest but his lips locked onto mine making speech impossible. I melted into it and clumsily returned the kiss before he pulled away. He looked positively frightening in a really sexy way towering above me on his knees, his eyes glowing in intensity. He looked like an animal. A sexy, manly, lust filled creature that would put any romance cover stud to shame.

I knew Gourry would never hurt me but that didn't stop the fear from creeping around the edges. I was completely at his mercy, straddled by his muscular thighs and pinned to the floor. His eyes swept over me as if deciding his next action on the battle field. This Gourry was so consumed with lust it was almost cold and calculating, but so cold that it burned like fire. That doesn't make sense, but keep up with me here; it was like a dream and I was pretty sure I'd had dreams like this before: Gourry was always an untamed sexual animal hunting me relentlessly until I was cornered, then…

And I am not sexually repressed! I just have more important things to think about. And do.

His hands slipped under my chamois then yanked it over my head. He bent over me, his lips finding a pink nipple. He teased the nub rock hard with his tongue. I closed my eyes and arched my back into the pleasure. His other hand tugged off the lacy shreds of my panties, his fingers slowly slid through the soft warm folds. His knees edged my legs apart. I gasped when he slid his fingers in but he silenced me with is his lips. I wound my fingers through his hair and tugged him closer. My body was so tense, racing towards a sudden end but he stopped abruptly. My cry of disappointment was smothered.

My thighs were slick and my need was so intense it was almost painful. It was too powerful and sudden to be my own and I was certain it stemmed from the candy sweetness that lingered on my host's lips. He had tried to drug me into submission and I resisted but now I was going to get what I really wanted. I ran my fingernails down Gourry's chest and hooked them on the hem of his little golden shorts. I tugged them down, but he grabbed by hand and pinned it underneath me then slowly slid his little pants off, his powerful gaze locked onto mine never wavering. I could feel his cock, hard and hot as it pressed against my thigh, his eyes still staring hungrily into mine, waiting. I could feel it against my leg, I could actually feel his heartbeat through it as it slowly got harder and pushed against me.

It wasn't fair that he was stalling like this! And what if someone walked in? I my pheromone fogged brain tugged the sheet over the both of us. There. That'd hide us. Anyway, I'd absolutely die if someone caught me doing the dirty in some smelly tank.

He hooked my leg over his waist and pressed against me sliding his shaft across my slit until I was ready to scream. He pressed his lips against the pulse of my neck. He was so close. I fought down the uncertainty threatening my lust-filled bliss. So what if I didn't know what to do? I was kidding myself if I thought Gourry hadn't had a fling or six- annoying chivalry and all. He'd just have to show me. And by show me I mean do me.

A calloused hand gripped my ass pinning me against him and with one quick thrust he was inside. My gasp of surprised pain was swallowed and quickly replaced by pressure and tingling heat. His hips pinioned back and forth like a well-oiled machine. I ground against him and tried to block out the rest of my night as strange visions flashed through my head from Xellos, to Naga, Martina and even to Zelgadis hovering over me but always back to Gourry, his blues eyes locked into mine his expression intense in its lust.

The pressure inside me built and built until my body ached with the tension. My palms felt hot and my chest burned from the strain. The pressure reached a peak and a tumbled over the edge as waves of pleasure washed over me I couldn't suppress the cry of ecstasy . Just as the last wave faded I felt Gourry go tense, his eyes squeezed shut, teeth grinding together as he pounded into me then he sagged as if deflated.

I stroked his cheek and probably would have said something really sappy, but the sheet was wrenched away exposing us. I screamed from embarrassment. I yanked the sheet back to hide my naked self and snapped up to see who would dare expose me. Xellos cried Gourry's name, Zelgadis mine. But a third chimed in and I turned to see.

Oh. Oh gods. No. No, please. What did I do? Why? WHY? NO!

"L…L…L…L…L…L…L-" Gourry caught me as my knees gave away.

Luna. Big Sis! Forgive meeeeeee!


	9. Chapter 8: Master, We Have a Visitor

Amelia squealed and dashed down the hall, one hand protecting her stinging derriere as Xellos pursued riding crop in hand. Fuming, he landed another hearty smack.

"How did this happen! I understood that you were to be watching. He was chained to a bed- are you so inept that he could just skip away?"

"I was only away for a minute, Master." Amelia glared back.

Zelgadis followed the strange pair down the hallway feeling wrong footed, a dog-eared cigarette, unlit, dangling from his lip. He was still adjusting to the harsh truths he had learned: his eyes been opened and what was seen could never be unseen. Or unheard. Or unfelt. And the taste… he really didn't want to get into that. Instead of thinking about that he'd just focus on the task at hand.

Amelia bursting into the room a few minutes ago had severely disoriented him. Xellos had swept after her without a glance for the chimera- Zelgadis, lost and confused, followed them through a secret door and down the hall.

He heard another fleshy whack against Amelia's pert ass. Watching this Zel fought with a whole host of emotions. Part of him was steaming at the thought of Xellos harming Amelia in any way, another part watched in smug satisfaction still smarting from the skillet blow to the head and yet another part was slightly aroused. He felt he was coming out of the worst of the drug-induced haze and now all he had to deal with was the burning shame of letting his body react in such a wanton way.

Xellos spanked Amelia down the hallway into the caged lift where she wedged herself into a corner to save her rear from further abuse. They rode up to the pink laboratory and Xellos propelled Amelia out with a jab to the ass and the faintest snarl. Amelia squealed.

"See if you can bring him up on the monitor." He demanded with a sniff. Was it just him, or did Zel sense boredom from the Mazoku? Amelia twirled some knobs and dials as Xellos examined his fingernails. Zelgadis hung a step back and watched Xellos. He couldn't place why, but he felt like the Mazoku knew what going to happen next and was merely filling time. What with all the comments about acting and lines- did he think this was some sort of game? Zel ground his teeth. And how could he even explain earlier…what he did? Then just disappearing and coming back all smug like nothing had ever happened. No. He was thinking about it too much. He just needed to focus on the task at hand. Getting out of this situation was the only logical course of action.

Images of rooms flicked past on the screen with little buzzes and pops.

"Master," Amelia drawled out with unhidden disgust, "we have a visitor."

Xellos looped an arm around the chimera's waist and dragged him towards the monitor where they saw a busty waitress loitering at the front door.

"That's…" Zel started, his memory hazy. This woman eerily reminded him of someone.

"You know this human?" Amelia demanded in her oiliest voice.

"No. Any reason I should?" He spat back.

Xellos was unconvinced as he glanced over the chimera with one open eye. "Oh, I see- tonight was not just a chance meeting. You came here with a purpose." Zel was taken aback at the accusation.

"Like hell. If I knew this was going to happen, I'd have just stayed at the inn and drunk myself into the gutter."

Xellos sniffed. "Charming. I'll have you know that this human is non-other than Dr. Luna P. Inverse, head of the department of investigation of that which you call U.D.H. Isn't that right, Zelgadis-san?" Xellos purred at his silkiest tapping Zel under the chin with his riding crop. Zel frowned.

"Huh?"

_Inverse?_

The stranger on the monitor examined the door then abruptly kicked it in.

"Hmm, she'll be in… the Zen Room." Xellos turned his attention away from the glowering chimera.

Amelia flicked a switch and the screen faded to another room where Dr. Luna P. hopefully-not-related-to-the-Inverse-he-knew-Inverse was soaking in the tacky décor.

"However, we shall see your relation momentarily." Xellos sniffed. He lounged against the blinking machine and pulled a large lever labeled "ACCIO" towards him with a sensual cry. The lights flickered and there was a distant rumble that grew louder until part of the wall burst forth in a spray of pink tile. A shining orb flew through the wall, zoomed down the ramp and deposited an unperturbed Dr. Luna before them.

The Dr. looked them up and down then locked eyes with Zelgadis. "Well if it isn't Greywords." She smiled. A chill ran down Zel's spine. "Been hearin' a fair bit about you." Her clipped speech and leering grin made the room feel cold. Zel wasn't sure what to think. "What're you doin' round a place like this?"

"Uuuh…" Zel was inexplicably afraid to answer the question. 

"Don't play games, good doctor: you know perfectly well what Zelgadis-san is doing here. It was your plan all along, was it not, to have him and his darling _female_ check out the layout, but unfortunately for you plans change. I hope you're adaptable- Zelgadis-kun here certainly is."

Zel gulped and burned red-hot with shame. Damn him! Damn him to some inescapable Mazoku hell!

"Nah. Didn't 'spect to see him here. Only came for one thing."

Zel was suddenly certain he knew what it was.

"I'm here to find Zangulus."

Okay, it wasn't what he was thinking.

"Zangulus?" Zel raised an eyebrow. Who the hell would come all this way to find him? "He was-"

Xellos slapped him with his riding crop to cut him off. Zel snarled.

"Zangulus? What do you know of Zangulus, Dr. Inverse?"

"Not that it's any of your business but he works for me. Ran off with his pay, job unfinished. I'm here to get what's mine. Oh, and he's like a cousin twice removed or something. You know. Family ties. Important."

Oh. Must have been a lot of money.

"Dr. Inverse-" Zel was cut off by an elated cry coming from the rainbow tank.

Xellos arched a meticulously painted eyebrow and stalked over to the tank. He flung the satin cover off the newly noticed quivering lump.

Zel was unsurprised to see Lina pop up though he called her name involuntarily, struck by the sight of her: fiery hair mused and her round face striking lit by rosy afterglow. Gourry, also unsurprisingly, popped up next to her looking glazed, yet triumphant. Zel nodded an impressed congrats but feared what would happen when the drugs wore off and everyone was left to deal with their evenings' affairs. He'd also need a few miles head-start before a certain red-head realized what had happened.

Lina went from ravishing to death-mask grey in 0.2 seconds at the sight of the entourage. At least she still didn't seem to have control over her magic or they'd already be dead. Her eyes were wide and shining with fear locked onto the good Dr. This confirmed a suspicion that the Inverses did indeed have a connection and it didn't seem to be a good one.

Zel sighed. It seemed this endless night was still young.

The night had suddenly turned even more nightmarish if that were even possible. I stood trembling in a tank with only a thin sheet between me and the two people I was currently most terrified of. Gourry had me protectively pressed against his side, a fold of sheet the only thing preserving whatever dignity he still had.

"Way to go little sis." Came the terrifyingly familiar voice. It floated over to me in a cloud of perverse pleasantness and the ever present promise of pain. I couldn't scream, I couldn't fall into the blessed emptiness of unconsciousness: I could do nothing but tremble in the face of true fear and know that I was, though I had certainly doubted it, most certainly in hell.

I didn't register the strange noises of surprise that erupted from my companions or the sheer illuminating joy on Xellos' face for what they were until much later. All I could see was the smiling visage of my older sister and know a punishment was coming. I wasn't sure what for- she never gave much of a reason. 'Character building' was what she called it. Her and the horrible wooden sword or… no. Not that! Not the slug barrel. NO! PLEASE! I'LL BE GOOD! I PROMISE! I'LL DO WHATEVER YOU ASK!

As I dissolved into a puddle of terrified goo hoping to evaporate into the stratosphere Gourry and Zel looked on perplexed.

"Oh dear, Lina-chan, snacking after midnight is bad for your health." Xellos fanned himself, happily soaking up my terror.

"But you-" He turned to face Gourry, his face a sudden mask of rage. "I made you, and I can brake you just as easily." Gourry squeezed me closer to his side.

Gourry's eyebrows scrunched together in confoundment. "Listen, I know this is supposed to be some stupid game-"

Xelloss shooshed Gourry with a tired wave of the hand. "Gourry-san, please, you must play by the rules."

Gourry looked poised to retort but the silvery smash of a gong drew everyone's attention to the balcony.

Naga wearing only what Naga would consider decent evening wear grinned down at us. "Dinner is prepared!" Per usual she didn't even seem to register what was happening around her.

Xellos pinched the bridge of his nose. "Excellent." He said in a flat voice. "Come Dr. Inverse. You shall have a chance to try the house specialty."

He threw a sneering look my way looking Gourry and I up and down. "Considering current circumstances formal dress is to be optional." He flipped his hair and sauntered towards the lift followed by his entourage and a smiling Dr. Inverse.

Gourry circled his arms around me and patted my back awkwardly making soothing sounds as though I were a frightened two year old. "Shh, Lina, it's okay. They're gone now. Let's go get some food."

Food. Yes. Food is good. I like food.

I sniffed, my terror subsiding for the moment. Then I remembered I was naked. And Gourry was naked. I was standing in some tank. Naked. With a naked man's arms around me. Naked. My face felt hot.

"Put some pants on, Gourry." I mumbled into his chest. I didn't even have the energy to kill him. "It's time to get some answers."

{Authors Note:}

Yeah, I know, no smut in this section. I've been messing around with a little side-quest if you will, which I will reveal later. In the next chapter I'll explain more about what's going on. I appreciate all the fav's and follow's so far. You guys are swell. ^^


	10. Chapter 9: The Dinner Party

A dainty ephemeral hand gently grasps a delicate teacup carved from the rarest gem. The gentle sloshing of the tea capsizes a slave ship deep in a forgotten sea.

**NARRATOR**

**Food has always played  
>a vital role<strong> **in life's rituals.  
>The breaking of<strong> **bread - the  
>last meal of the condemned<br>** **man - and now this meal.  
>However<strong> **informal it might  
>appear you can be<strong> **sure there  
>was to be very little<strong> **'bonhomie'.**

We sat around a tacky coffin shaped table, Xellos at the head. He trained his lips into a haughty pout and looked bored. His eyes, still open, flicked towards Luna occasionally. When I would look away from him I was certain I could feel his gaze on me also.

I hitched up the sheet that was playing replacement dinner wear. Gourry had draped it around me more artfully than I would have expected, tying it in a big guady bow. Amelia and Naga stood behind Xellos sentinal. Amelia with a bottle of wine, Naga with a plate of thick meat slices. My stomach didn't so much as rumble as roar with need. Gourry was staring the platter down. I knew we were thinking the same thing. If Naga doesn't kick her ass into some meat serving action I don't know how much longer I could stand it before I jumped her.

Amelia started forward first sloping wine into the mismatched glasses without a care. The dirty white table cloth was soon a deep purple.

Xellos cleared his throat and held up his glass. "First, a toast." His pursed lips stretched into a smile that made my skin crawl. I looked away. "To absent friends." A few people mumbled something but my attention was fully held by the meat.

Next, and more importantly, Naga sauntered around the table slapping slices of meat down on plates with a splat. I was vibrating with anticipation. It was inexpertly cooked, one side was a hair above raw but the juice didn't even have time to settle before half the slab was in my mouth. I chewed with gusto. Gourry had inhaled his considerable slice in seconds. He was eyeing my other half so I shoved it into my mouth gulping down poorly chewed mouthfuls. He sighed and went back to stalking Naga's platter with his eyes.

Feeling considerably heartened by the scant offerings I gulped down my dirty glass of wine slamming it down on the table. I opened my mouth the speak by was cut off by none other than my sister. My mouth clamped shut. I had forgotten she was there somehow.

"I believe you brought me here to discuss Zangulus." She daintily cut a piece of meat chewing it deliberately.

"Zangulus!" Martina shrieked, raising from her seat.

Xellos merely chuckled. "I'm afraid that's a rather tender subject. Would anyone care for another slice."

Martina blanched then pushed her plate away. I signaled for another slice immediately. Martina threw me a look of the deepest loathing. "Excuse me." She choked out, then ran from the room with a terrible scream. Naga splatted another slice down on my plate.

Zelgadis cleared his throat. "I believe he was implying that this is the remains of Zangulus." He said at his driest.

"He vaporized him on the spot." I reasoned, taking a big bite. "Besides, this tastes too much like wild boar. I doubt Zangy'd have such a gamey taste."

Zelgadis did not comment nor did he finish his slice. I was about to dive for it when that terrifying person I was trying to ignore spoke up again.

Luna leaned in our direction and stage whispered. "I knew he was in with a bad crowd, but I never expected this: Mazoku." I choked on my meat.

She never lost her broad smile as she turned back to Xellos. I shrunk in my chair.

"Is that so Dr. Inverse- or shall I say, Dr. Von Inverse!" Luna smiled.

"That doesn't even make sense." Zelgadis frowned at Xellos.

Xellos brandished a steak knife at him with a snarl. Zelgadis raised his eyebrows and I could tell he was trying not to roll his eyes at the flimsy blade.

"That's alright, Zelgadis." She waved him off. I think I'm supposed to start a song now, yes?" She laughed. Xellos's smile became a little strained.

"What ever do you mean. I thought we were still discussing Zangulus?"

"Nah, don't care all that much about him actually. I'm more interested in what you're doing here."

I stuck the last piece of meat in my mouth, chewing as I watched Xellos's face. His smile was becoming increasingly strained and his eyes were closed again. His eyebrow twitched.

I could hear the strained sound of Martina singing down the hallway. I caught snippets of the words and her confession of love for Zangulus. I immediately lost interest. I turned back to the contest of wills around the table. Gourry had snuck Zelgadis's unfinished pork onto his own plate and was well on his way to finishing it off.

I was starting to feel woozy again, certain that something had been in the wine but my head was clearer than it had been most of the night. I watched what amounted to the worlds stupidest staring contest as Xellos never opened his eyes and no one could really tell what my sister was looking at with her obscure choice of hairstyle.

My sister broke "eye contact" with Xellos and stood abruptly. With a mighty heave she flipped the table. No one had been expecting it and everyone dove out of the way. Even Xellos looked surprised. I was tangled in my sheet but Gourry pulled me to safety, holding me against him as my weak knees shook. Zelgadis cursed and leapt to our side. He was staring at the floor with a nasty expression.

Oh. Well that was different.

Under the table was an insanely detailed magic circle. Runes were carved into the rock floor but they seemed to change if I stared at the too hard. It was hurting my eyes. Such circles' powers were related to their size but I had a sneaking suspicion that this might only be the center. "I've seen these before..." I whispered.

Zelgadis was stunned, he turned to me staring intently with bloodshot eyes. "What is it?" He hissed back, barely audible.

"When we were looking for the Claire Bible-" Xellos's whine cut me off.

"Mau, Luna-san, that was my line..." He pouted. Luna's smile never changed.

"You really ought not improvise, not at such a delicate moment." He said in a strangely frank voice.

"Don't care." My sister replied.

"I can see the family resemblance." Zel quipped the side. I chose to ignore this seeing as how there were other things to worry about. I'd just put it on the list of things I'd kill him for later.

"While I appreciate the invitation to your little party, it occurs to me that I might have not been the intended recipient." My sister went on. Xellos frowned neither confirming nor denying the comment.

"But I'm afraid I've been ordered to cut this gig short. Creating a gateway to this dimension is strictly prohibited. "

"Well, Luna-san," Xellos said brightly. "Things probably aren't going to go as planned."

"Why's that?" She raised and eyebrow. I think.

"Because by entering this area you enter a contract and the contract must be completed to it's end or you'll be required to stay until it is fulfilled. But by then..." He smiled.

"By then?" This time it was me asking.

"That's a secret." He smiled.

As they had been talking a buzzing noise had been steadily raising. The noise was becoming increasingly obvious as angry voices hissing in the background.

"But more importantly." Xellos started towards me. "How could you!" He sneered, backhanding me. I staggered backwards. Xellos inserted himself between me and Gourry so I did the first thing that came to mind and bolted from the room. I kept tripping on my skirt and staggering in an effort to put distance between us. Xellos was hot on my heels. I thought I heard music and was enraged when I finally understood what Xellos was saying as chased me.

"I'll tell you once, won't tell you twice- you're apple pie don't taste too nice."

I whipped around. "You got a lot of balls saying that to me, buddy!" I screamed, face burning.

"I've laid that seed, should be all you need." He said reaching for my sheet. I could see Zelgadis and Gourry pounding down the hallway, my sister following at a leisurely pace but too far to block Xellos. I wrenched away from him flying down the hallway as fast as my jello-y knees would carry me.

"You're as sensual as a pencil, wound up like an E on first string."

I hit a dead end, but turned back snarling at that remark.

"When we made it, did you hear a bell ring?"

We were face to face when the wall behind me gave. I toppled through, but managed to quickly right myself. I was dimmly aware that I was back in the lab and dashed down the ramp towards the lift. Xellos cut me off and I sidestepped around the tank trying to keep something between us. Gourry and Zelgadis dashed down the ramp. Gourry halted in front of me. "Go for the exit!" He demanded, his eyes never leaving Xellos. Zelgadis was at my back panting. I sighed and squared my shoulders. Running wouldn't do me a damn bit of good.

Xellos skipped towards the machine. "The transducer," he slammed a handle down "will seduce 'ya."

The air crackled with energy. The three of us froze on the spot in a grim face off. It felt like someone had Shadow Snapped me to the floor.

"My feet, I can't move my feet!" Tumbled out of my mouth. I couldn't move much anything else for the matter but my arms were still free.

My sister was standing off to the side, leaning against one of the nude statues. "My wheels. I can't move me wheels." She said grinning. Well, I'm glad someone found this situation humorous.

"It's as if we're glued to the spot!" Zelgadis spat out.

"You are!" Xellos oozed out. "So quake with fear your tiny fools!"

"We're trapped." I growled out fighting off another dramatic wail or anguish.

"It's something you'll get used to. A mental mind-fuck can be nice!" Xellos added sauntering over towards me.

"You won't find humans quite the easy mark as you imagined. I suppose this sonic transducer- it is, I suppose, some sort of audio-vibrato-physio-molecular transport device?" Luna rattled off, still cool as a cucumber.

"You mean?" Zelgadis started, having been the only one who followed the stream of nonsense.

"Yes, Zel-kun, it's something the Sorcerers Guild has been working on for quite some time, but it seems our friend here has found a means of perfecting it. A device, which is capable of breaking down solid matter and then projecting it through space and, who knows, perhaps even time itself."

"But... don't we already have the sort of capability?" Zelgadis mumbled, nonplussed.

"Work with me here." Luna smiled at him.

"You mean he's going to send us to another dimension?" I sighed.

He sauntered over and started bad touching me, running his hands down my hips and telling me to wise up and a few other choice comments I chose to ignore. I shoved and batted at him, unable to move most of my body. He kept shooting looks at Gourry who looked as if he would gladly poke a few holes into my tormenter. But that was little consolation when I noticed Amelia lounging against a machine, her arm resting on a lever. She absentmindedly swayed her hips to the music that was ever present.

[NARRATOR]

**And then she cried out...**

"Stoooop!" I yelled unable to push Xellos away.

Gourry opened his mouth to protest Xellos's treatement of me when with her creepy brain-washed grin, Amelia pulled the lever turning Gourry into a nude marble statue. A well-sculpted one at that.

Zelgadis had barely opened his mouth when the lever went a second time also turning him into... a stone statue.

My sister chuckled, not bothering to try and escape when the lever went a third time.

I locked eyes with Amelia and she leered and down went the lever.


End file.
